Picture Us Together
by golden harp
Summary: Kurt Hummel, previous member of New Directions, decides to take advantage of his new school, to put an end to his lack of experience in relationships. Meanwhile, Blaine Anderson, isn't sure about his feelings towards serious commitment.
1. Pilot

**Title: **Picture Us Together  
**Author: **golden harp  
**Pairing: Klaine**  
**Disclaimer**: I do not own Glee or any other characters, plot etc, all belongs to Ryan Murphy and Fox.

**Summary:** Kurt Hummel, a previous member of New Directions, decides to take advantage of his new school the Dalton Academy, to put an end to his lack of experience in relationships. Meanwhile, Blaine Anderson, his best new friend in the Academy, isn't so sure about his feelings towards serious relationships.

**Story Warnings**: If you don't like slash you better stop reading right here, the plot might also contain language and violence. So beware!

**Chapter Rating**: this chapter is a T

Picture Us Together

By

Golden Harp

It was a cold and windy morning in the Dalton Academy and Tired Blaine couldn't concentrate in the lesson, but on the other hand couldn't stop staring at their sexy substitute teacher for math.

He did his best not to look at him straight in the eyes, because it could get pretty embarrassing, but wasn't able to control the glares that were sneaking in his eyes from time to time.

He wrote a note for Kurt that was sitting right next to him, folded it and touched Kurt's hand. Kurt jumped in surprise, probably too concentrated in the lesson, then he read the note and nodded "Yeah, he does have an awesome torso"

Thoughts Collided inside Kurt's head "To make an actual step or not?"

Just the possibility that Blaine might not be pleased with the idea of sharing a kiss with him caused his stomach to sting and sore.

By the end of the lesson, 'and thank god it was the last', Kurt thought to himself, a decision was made. No more pondering, imagining or pretending in his head, he is going to find out what exactly can make Blaine fall for him.

When they both climbed down the stairs, enjoying the relaxing feeling of freedom, Blaine fantasized of an iced coffee with cream and a donut, while the only thing Kurt could possibly think of is the joy that he felt when Blaine touched his hand today.

"I'm starving, Lets go get some coffee and donuts" Blaine suggested.

"Sure" Kurt said and then felt mad at himself for almost not speaking at all today and for being too shy. He forced himself to say something.

"You Know, I.. I've been thinking about Glee club a lot, lately, you know since we're going to compete against them at Regionals" Kurt managed to finish his sentence while they entered the the Lima Bean.

"Oh, Don't worry about it, we're going to beat them without any doubt" he said with excitement and then whispered "And your sexy faces got way better than what they were last week" Kurt Blushed and noticed his heart pounding to the sound of Blaine articulating the word 'Sexy'.

After Blaine ordered, they both sat down on an empty table in front of each other and Kurt tried to focus on anything but Blaine's bright eyes, But couldn't. And now they gazed back at him, trying to follow Kurt's actions.

"Kurt, you wanna come by and do homework together this afternoon?" said Blaine with his usual enthusiastic tone.

"Um, sure I just need to check at home first, see how my father's doing" Kurt hoped that he reacted all right to this one, but wasn't sure.

"Uh. Sure, no problem" he said politely "you can come by at four or five or whatever, hopefully we'll be finished before nightfall" he said sarcastically and smiled

"Don't worry, I'll help you it's no big deal" said Kurt when they got separated from each other on the way home.

Kurt was sitting on his bed, Watching TV when the phone rang. 'Maybe it's Blaine' he thought and immediately felt his heart pounding fast. But it was just Rachel.

"Hi, what's going on with you?" she asked

"Oh. Nothing special, I'm just fine. You know, I have to study a lot harder, but at least here everybody treats me fairly" he sighed.

"I'm so happy for you, you know, we all miss you and your talent" she added "but the most important thing here is you! Getting ready for the contest?"

"Yeah, we're practicing hard"

"What's with all the screaming in your room? Is there someone with you?"

"Oh no" he laughed "That's just a combination of the television and Pavarotti, my Bird, He always starts to sing when I'm on the phone"

"Well" Rachel continued "I just hope you've made some good friends there, and maybe made a move on that cute Blaine" she implied

"You're not still into him, are you? You just said he's cute!" he said dramatically

"Um I..I just think he's pretty charismatic and a..a great kisser" she said unwillingly "yes, I have to admit, the guy must have been with a few partners before, he's such a pro" she giggled.

"But don't get the wrong idea!" she continued "I saw him staring at you on Valentine's Day when we were all together at Breadstix"

"Really?" Kurt was completely surprised.

"Yeah, probably dedicated that love song to you" she sighed. "Maybe…maybe he told you he's not into you because he wants you to get the hots for him?" she said excited "he wants you to pursue him, so you won't be getting him too easily"

'It could have been amazing if it were true, I don't know what to say... I've never been with anyone" Kurt looked at his watch, 'it was almost 4 o'clock' he though and started feeling stressed.

"Rachel I've gotta go, promise to tell you more later" Kurt said in a hurry

"But wait-" he hung up

Kurt started pulling aggressively from his closet shirts, trousers, belts and hats, trying on and off any possible match that could fit the event.

He decided to go on a sophisticated look and picked up the white collar shirt, his favorite tight pants and added black framed eyeglasses. With clear satisfaction he took his schoolbag and went down the stairs

"Bye dad, I'm going to go study with a friend**"** He said filled with joy

"Wait, Kurt. What did you say?"

"I'm going to a friend's house" he said simply

"Let me guess, you're off to that Blaine, from your new school" Burt said seriously

"Ma…Maybe, Why?" now he's starting to get worried

"Kurt, you never came back to talk to me about these pamphlets I gave you, so I'm a bit worried, have you read them?"

"Yeah" Kurt replied

"Did you understand everything?"

"Yes dad. It's not that complicated" he began to feel impatient.

"Good, I want to be sure you're ready to be doing what you're gonna do" Burt implied

"Dad, Blaine and I are not together, we're no couple, just learning some math. That's all"

"I trust you Kurt, and if that's all then that's all, but if there ever will be different intentions I want you to come and talk to me about it, and most of all I want you to feel free to ask me whatever that you need, and if you" he lowered his voice "do need some condoms, I got you a pack inside that drawer" he pointed at the cabinet that held books and family framed photos.

"Thanks dad" he barely pronounced the word in his mouth. Too ashamed of himself to speak, he stepped outside the house and went to the bus station.

While he was waiting there, Kurt tried to guess what would happen today. Would he finally dare to make a first move, or would he be too scared to speak?

The disturbing thoughts finally disappeared when he rang Blaine's doorbell, from there it was only Instinct, at least from what he could remember.

A/N: As you can probably see, this is my first fanfic on this website. If you liked it, please review! Any comment will be helpful and could push this project on to the next chapters.


	2. Courage

**Title: **Picture Us Together  
**Author: **golden harp  
**Pairing: Klaine**  
**Disclaimer**: I do not own Glee or any other characters, plot etc, all belongs to Ryan Murphy and Fox.

**Summary:** Kurt Hummel, a previous member of New Directions, decides to take advantage of his new school the Dalton Academy, to put an end to his lack of experience in relationships. Meanwhile, Blaine Anderson, his best new friend in the Academy, isn't so sure about his feelings towards serious relationships.

**Story Warnings**: If you don't like slash you better stop reading right here, the plot might also contain language, violence and adult themes. So beware!

**Chapter Rating**: T

Chapter 2 – Courage

Kurt thought that something is about to burst from his chest when the door opened in front of him.

"Come in, my room is up the stairs"

The smile that was smeared on Blaine's face when Kurt entered his apartment, became fixated in Kurt's his head alongside with the sweet smell of his hair.

While Climbing up the stairs to the third floor, Kurt attempted to walk slowly and keep a gap between them, at least until he'll manage to stop trembling.

'What's going on with me?' he wondered 'no, no backing from this plan no matter how sexy I think he is' "I can do this" he accidently said out loud and then regretted.

"Do what?" Blaine inquired.

"Oh no…I started solving the equation at home and, never mind" he sighed.

They reached his attic room. Blaine opened the door and offered Kurt to enter.

"Well, It's your first time in my room so the most important rule here is - feel at home" he blinked "you can take off your shoes, and your school bag if you like" Kurt refused nicely "no, I'm fine with my shoes on"

"As you wish, but I was planning that we study on my bed"

"Fine" he hissed and took off his shoes.

"Wow, these black trousers are totally awesome"

"Thank you" Kurt couldn't help blushing.

"Let's just finish this fast. I wanna show you a few things afterwards"

"O.K" he started placing his books on the bed "I just need to find my pencil sharpener" Kurt browsed his schoolbag.

"It doesn't matter. I'll give you one of my pencils" said Blaine impatiently.

"Are your parents here?" Kurt tried to gain information.

"Um…no. Why?"

"Just wondering" he answered innocently and smiled.

"Actually they're off for the weekend, so I'm considering throwing a party" Blaine mumbled.

"Oh" Kurt wasn't sure where is that leading him.

"But a calmed weekend also seems like a great idea, I feel so exhausted lately" he admitted.

"Why?" Kurt inquired.

"No, it really doesn't matter…you know, just need to get some silly things off my mind" he continued "But now we're gonna get concentrated"

"Well, what do you say we start with geometry?" Kurt suggested reluctantly.

"Sure. Each of us will solve separately, and then we'll compare to see if our answers match"

After three exercises Kurt heartbeat started to chill, feeling again that he can breathe freely next to Blaine, and gaze at his sexy concentrated look once in a while, when he's not noticing.

Blaine felt a weird itch, as if he is been stared at. He didn't want to stare back and scare the confused guy so he nonchalantly kept working.

Kurt was having a hard time understanding this situation. Until two weeks ago he used to feel fine near Blaine: no cramps in his stomach, no strained muscles... What happened that suddenly he cannot stand more than a minute next to him without acting like an idiot?

'Blaine knows so much and I know nothing, and I'm pretty sure he's reading my thoughts right now' he flipped a page in the book and started writing down the number of the new exercise. He drew a new triangle while focusing on feeling less uncomfortable 'It won't matter anymore if I know nothing, because I'm gonna make things happen'

He gazed again at Blaine: He was at the same position, tilting his head down, holding the pencil close to his mouth and thinking.

Kurt acted up as if he's rechecking his answers when a clear final sentence appeared on the blackboard of his mind "DO IT NOW!"

With only his right hand moving, Kurt pulled his ipod from his bag and selected the Karaoke. He placed the ipod on Blaine's bed, stood straight and started singing while his voice is a bit shaking:

"Live in my house, I'll be your shelter, just pay me back with one thousand kisses. Be my lover and I'll cover you" Blaine seemed surprised in a positive way, he didn't say a word but Kurt could see that he is impressed.

Kurt gained confidence and continued while adding some simple dancing moves "Open your door, I'll be your tenant. Don't got much baggage to lay at your feet, but sweet kisses I've got to spare. I'll be there and I'll cover you" he pointed at Blaine and feeling of success raged through him.

Blaine finally reacted to him in the chorus and they both sang together "I think they meant it when they said you can't buy love, now I know you can rent it a new lease you are my love, on life be my life"

Blaine reached the high notes so easily that Kurt started thinking 'now you've turned me on even more' but did his best to stay focused so he won't lose control over his voice.

Kurt prepared himself to the peak of the song and gathered courage " Just slip me on, I'll be your blanket. Wherever whatever, I'll be your coat. You'll be my king, and I'll be your castle"

"You'll be my queen and I'll be your moat" Blaine answered with a full powerful chest voice. Both of them moved their hands like they're dancing on the stage in Broadway, setting free all their boundaries…

Kurt jumped on Blaine's bed and raised his hands in the air "Oh, lover I'll cover you"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah" they sang together, opening their throats to reach the high notes and gazing at each other's eyes.

"Oh, lover I'll cover you" They finished the song together in perfect accordance, each one at his pitch.

Kurt saw the amusement reflecting from Blaine's eyes, and finally felt satisfied.

He jumped on Blaine and hugged him as his hands ran down Blaine's back, groping his fur sweater. The thoughts that lingered in Kurt head rose up "To kiss him now? Too early? Or maybe too late?"

To his dismay, Kurt didn't have the time to enjoy the feeling of Blaine's body, as Blaine drew him away.

"Kurt, you're awesome" he glanced at him "you're full of enthusiasm and talent and that goes around perfectly with your sweet tenderness" he sighed "You know, it feels really good to know that I've found a friend that can balance me between being serious and having fun" Blaine's eyes glittered with satisfaction.

"Are you kidding me? You're the one who taught me all of that, you deserve to be praised" Kurt explained with a grateful tone.

"Kurt, we're very close friends, why did you push me away when I tried to help you?"

"What? When did that happened?" Kurt was too concentrated on other things to be able to remember.

"Two weeks ago? When we almost had some kind of 'The Talk'? I didn't mean to brag I did it because I care about you, and you made me leave a little worried"

"Don't worry about me, I'm fine" Kurt started closing his heart again, wrapping up against what Blaine might say.

"I'm just gonna say that it's not a normal case for a guy your age not to know anything, so…please be responsible and be careful" Blaine explained with simplicity.

"Blaine, could you please stop? You're not my dad! I've exposed my lack of experience to you because I trusted that you'd understand"

Kurt was hurt, again rose inside him the old feeling that he's just a little boy that doesn't know the true meaning of having an intimate relationship. 'It doesn't matter any way' he thought.

"Right now Blaine, I'm looking for true love, and it might sound naïve to you but I'll prove you that you're wrong and that relationship doesn't always have to involve sex as their main interest" Kurt's eyes burned with frustration.

"Kurt, please come down. I've…I've had good intentions" Blaine stuttered.

"Well we both know I have feelings for you" he fired the words at him "there wasn't any need for me to hide it today. You saw it all right through me!" Kurt seemed more panicked than ever.

Blaine was shocked from Kurt's behavior 'What am I missing here?' he tried to figure out.

"Kurt whatever you're going through, I'm here to understand you" Blaine attempted to pull some more information from him.

"I don't want your understanding and support, don't you get it?" he yelled at him.

"I'm not the cute little gay guy you thought I was when you first met me, and I don't even intend to prove you that I am more experienced than you. You'll see for yourself"

"Wait, didn't we just agree that we're good friends that understand each other and knows how to help one another in crisis?" Blaine raised his voice.

"Well I thought you were, but it turned out to be a mistake. You can't change the way that I want to see the world"

He took a deep breath, and said a bit unsure "I think I should leave"

**A/N: **yeah, the angst is starting right here, and it's just going to get more tangled.

I was a bit confused myself that Kurt changed his behavior so suddenly, but Blaine really hit a nerve…

If you liked this fic feel free to write a comment, reviews are very uplifting as you probably know for yourselves.

And if you're curious to know what will happen next, you can always subscribe.

**Disclaimer 2**: I do not own "Rent" the musical or the song "I'll cover you" from it.

All rights belong to the talented writer Jonathan Larson. (And if you by mistake haven't watched Rent yet – Run and see!)


	3. Memorable Moment

**Title: **Picture Us Together  
**Author: **golden harp  
**Pairing: Klaine** (Kurt + Blaine)  
**Disclaimer**: I do not own Glee or any other characters, plot etc, all belongs to Ryan Murphy and Fox.

**Summary:** Kurt Hummel, a previous member of New Directions, decides to take advantage of his new school the Dalton Academy, to put an end to his lack of experience in relationships. Meanwhile, Blaine Anderson, his best new friend in the Academy, isn't so sure about his feelings towards serious relationships.

**Story Warnings**: If you don't like slash or sex scenes involving two men or more, you better stop reading right here, the plot might also contain language and violence. So beware!

**Chapter Rating**: M

Chapter 3 – memorable moment

"Dad, I'm home" Kurt said monotonously and ran up the stairs to his room without even waiting for an answer.

Burt glared at his son and saw a desperate Kurt. He looked so pale as if all his blood was sucked out of him.

To his dismay, Kurt bumped into Finn on his way up the stairs.

"Hey dude, what's going on with you?" Finn inquired

"Sorry Finn, I'd rather be left alone right now" he started whispering heavily and started weeping.

Kurt entered his room, while Finn kept staring at him, trying to guess what happened. He decided not to leave him alone in his distress just yet.

"Um Kurt, you want me to get you a glass of water?" No response.

As Finn came back upstairs from the kitchen he opened Kurt's room's door and cautiously put a full glass on a small shelf. "Look, I'm not gonna push you into anything, but just wanted you to know I'll be in my room if you do want to spill it out" he mumbled.

Finn rushed to explain himself "If someone hurt your feelings, don't keep it inside, O.K?" Finn smiled at him and then had a terrible flashback to last year:

_While taking out books from his locker, Kurt suddenly ran into him and began talking about stuff he really didn't care about like style and shoes, like he's trying too hard to impress. And the worst part: Finn could not help but to notice the dreamy look smeared on his eyes…  
_  
'Oh no' Finn had a terrible fear from Kurt being again obsessively in love with him (as he is obsessive with almost everything), the last thing he wanted right now was Kurt getting the wrong idea from his attention. 'I better go check on Quinn…this could make my day a little nicer' he thought to himself and left the house

Kurt didn't want to spend another second crying on his pillow, although Blaine's word's depressed him. He wanted Blaine to look at him as sexy and manly and didn't like the idea of 'the mentor and the kid' relationship. He'd seen so many movies about such relationships and they never ended up in snuggling.

His mom came to his mind after a series of failure-depressing thoughts 'Mom, you knew what it is like, this true love thing, huh? Dad loved you so badly… you must've experienced such feeling. What to do mom? How am I supposed to change Blaine's behavior?'

'Who cares about that' a voice that didn't sound motherly popped in his head 'you made a move on him and the asshole didn't respond as you've expected, so move on!'

"I'm moving on!" he answered the voice and repeated the words in his head as a mantra.

He picked up his phone and called Rachel "how 'bout another girl's night?"

"Oh, I'd love to!" Rachel replied without second thoughts "I'll tell Mercedes to come too, O.K?"

"Yeah, sure. The more the better. Just keep in mind that Finn will be here too"

"Um, I don't mind. I'm coming to see you, not him" she laughed.

"You're totally over him, huh?"

"Kind of. I'm more like, seeking new options for me. Maybe Finn's simply not the one"

"Too bad. I just started liking you as a couple"

"So… How 'bout you and great-lips?" she implied.

"What?" Kurt sounded annoyed

"You know I'm talking about Blaine"

"I never kissed him so that wasn't the association that popped in my mind" he tried to explain.

"Kurt. It's somehow doesn't make sense to me that you two haven't. Well that's how I'll fit in the picture. Berry's matchmaking office at your service!" Rachel was more excited than ever.

"Tomorrow at seven, don't forget!" he reminded her at the end of the conversation, just before hanging up.

He lied back on his bed thinking what to do for the rest of the evening. He didn't feel like going out for a walk and didn't even have the right mood for shopping.

Kurt decided to go to bed early, he was obviously thinking too much. But at least he was aware of that.

In the next morning Kurt sat in a different place in the left corner of the front row, and tried not to look into Blaine's direction. He did his best to stay concentrated on the lesson, but his thoughts were focused on the best way to conquer Blaine. He imagined himself walking with another tall sexy looking guy at the mall, holding hands and smirking at each other while Blaine was spying after them curiously, dying to know if they're on a date. His extreme imaginations caused him to smile unknowingly.

'What's he so happy about?' Blaine thought immediately 'Oh I just wish he could have been a little bit more mature. Literally.'

'Did Blaine just look at me? Shoot! I can't believe I wasn't focused enough to catch him red-handed' he started drawing in his notebook since he couldn't write anything. Well, He'll figure out something, Rachel will probably know how to help him this afternoon.

After school, Kurt didn't want his intentions discovered so he avoided Blaine as much as possible. As the bell rang, he packed all of his stuff and rushed outside the classroom. He ran quickly as if he's running late for something, evasively ignoring the man he loves.

Blaine stared at Kurt's from the top of the staircase as the young boy disappeared.

'What's going on with him today? Not even making eye contact with me. Now that's weird. He IS going through something, I can see for sure'

Kurt had a 'temporary solution' for his loneliness, every time he didn't want to be seen alone between (or even after) classes, he went to hide in the last room of the first floor corridor, just near the basement stairs. It used to be the chess club's room, but the club ceased to exist last year so he made it his hideout: Big, cozy and lockable from the inside…

He entered the deserted room, locked the door from inside and lit up the fireplace. Kurt picked up the Patti LuPone biography from his schoolbag and sat on the large red sofa. He finally felt that he's starting to relax.

In that evening, All Kinds of nail polish was scattered on Kurt's large bed : pink, white, green and yellow,shiney colors that made him happy. He just loved to plan in advance what style to match both of the girls. Not to mention that Rachel's nails were always fun to work on: they were long and strong and he could attempt whatever was on his imagination.

"O.K. Mercedes…" he said as he passed on to her nails "Are you dating someone now?" Mercedes could tell from the look on his face that he was truly interested.

"There was this senior guy, Ross" but we actually broke up just after you left us" she said shyly.

"Oh, you know you deserve better than him girl!" he cheered her.

"Yeah. I agree" Rachel supported.

"Rachel" Kurt slowed down his pace as it was clear what he's about to say "are you still…?" he pointed at the door of his room.

"I'm not into him anymore" she replied immediately "I'm really not!" she insisted "I'm starting to look for a real man, who won't be insecure about his feelings for me. A man who will know I'm not just any other girl" she sounded too broken to be reliable about this.

Kurt heard a vague noise from the corridor and thought 'Finn's in his room by now. I wonder if he can hear all this. Well, I guess it doesn't matter if she's past that phase.'

"Kurt, we both want to hear about you" she said warmly and placed her hand forward. "You know. How's it going in school? Do you feel better there?"

"I really am, Mercedes. I truly feel accepted there for who I am. The Warblers consume most of my afternoons, but it's cool" he sighed 'How exactly will I survive these meetings without speaking with Blaine?'

"And there's also some kind of studying group club that I'm in, since the math level's higher than I'm used to. So….I sometimes go there on Wednesdays"

"Kurt, I'm really happy for you" Rachel hugged him "It's a great solution to all… I mean to you" she regretted her words.

"Don't think for a second that we forgot you!" Mercedes added.

"I have to admit you were the guy with the cutest voice there, and it'll be much harder to win without you" Rachel lied on his bed, placing her hands under her chin.

"Kurt, we're waiting for a long time for you to raise THE subject. We're just too curious to know" Rachel smirked

"Yeah! What's exactly going on between you and awesome-lips?" Mercedes said intrigued

"It's great-lips" Rachel corrected dryly.

"Well?" the pressure exceeded.

He wanted to share all that's happened with them, but wasn't too sure how they'd accept it. He decided on half-lies that no one will be able to detect anyway, because even though they're emotional girls, his sexuality seemed just too complex at the moment to be understood.

"Um, you all know the story how I gave him a huge hint that I'm into him. It was the day the Warblers did a number at the mall, and he didn't show the slightest interest and was all into being friends" the girls nodded in agreement.

Kurt continued "O.K, it's like I gave him the idea of it, of us together, 'cause ever since that day he gives me suggestive looks, inviting me to spend some time together, I mean, Just the two of us" he seemed as he's trying to recall something.

"And I think something did change in him" he stated to whisper "He just makes me imagine all these terrible, amazing fantasies… of him and I going to the prom together. There! I said it! That's my fantasy." He smiled timidly

_'And I won't take no for an answer' _the future crawled to his mind for a split second and then disappeared.

"Oh Kurt, you're such a sweet guy…With these cute piggy eyes…how…how could he refuse you?" Rachel resented.

"Or more importantly" Mercedes stopped her, "How could it be he said a 'no' when he obviously meant a 'yes'? We already told you that from the side, objectively, it seems that he wants you" she admitted too.

"That's so annoying" Kurt started the 'I-have-no-choice-but-to-lie' part. "I asked him out again yesterday and he avoided answering"

"What DID he say?" Mercedes inquired.

"I…I don't remember the exact words, but I just felt like he's trying to shake me off the idea"

"Can't you see?" said Rachel with confidence "Obviously, He's still in the phase of 'checking you out, like, if you're worth it. I'm sure of it!"  
"So… what should I do?" Kurt was mad at himself for being so naïve right now.

"Easy. We'll hang out the three of us together and we'll help you meet another gay guy that will help you to get over your feelings for him"

"Rachel, I don't think I can love another guy right now…" he wanted to shout with anger 'how can she not understand?' but held himself.

"I know how you feel. It's just for the time being. You'll show him that other men find you attractive" she said with enthusiasm.

"Guess I have no choice" he smiled as he finished Mercedes's nails.

It was a rainy Thursday and Kurt didn't want to ruin his Armani coat.

He sat on a bench near the entrance of the school, waiting for the weather to improve.

He saw three friends stuffing together into one big red umbrella, running in the flood, laughing at each other.

Same old thoughts about him not having friends popped, and he brushed them away, because right now he really didn't care.

He turned left to his official hideout to relax near the fireplace, thinking about how he should already return this heavy book to the library.

Suspicious noises came from the room, as Kurt feared, someone else found his cozy chamber.

'So much for the hideout' he sighed. He peeked through the keyhole, trying to target the sofa without further success. When he heard the familiar sound he felt as if a stone smashed his heart 'it's Blaine'.

Kurt's heartbeat reacted respectively, beating faster and faster. He could see through the keyhole a mirror that reflected Blaine's naked body.

The mumbling was now clearer, Blaine was urging another man to thrust harder, gasping and moaning.

Kurt froze. It was tempting to watch. But it was also harsh. That day was carved in his memory so hard, that there wasn't even one night that month that he hasn't thought of it when he tried to sleep.

Kurt didn't raise his eyes from that spot yet.

Blaine tucked the man into a wet kiss. He bent over to the man's nipples and licked them.

There was pure obsession in Blaine's eyes as he replaced himself the floor on his bare knees on, tilting his head down, opening his mouth ajar to swallow another man's bulging erection. Blaine sucked it smoothly, and it seemed that he enjoyed it. His face expressed pure seductiveness.

Kurt couldn't see Blaine's erection through the mirror, no matter how hard he tried, but he stayed the whole time, quiet as mouse, until he saw that both men were starting to dress up.

He ran outside of the school through the rain, wondering what he really wants.

**A/N:** This chapter was longer than the previous, and therefore took time to write. So thanks to all of you who waited patiently for it, and huge huge thanks to all of you who subscribed. You made my weekend!


	4. Decision was made

**Title: **Picture Us Together  
**Author: **golden harp  
**Pairing: Klaine** (Kurt + Blaine)  
**Disclaimer**: I do not own Glee or any other characters, plot etc, all belongs to Ryan Murphy and Fox.

Summary: Kurt Hummel, a previous member of New Directions, decides to take advantage of his new school the Dalton Academy, to put an end to his lack of experience in relationships. Meanwhile, Blaine Anderson, his best new friend in the Academy, isn't so sure about his feelings towards serious relationships.

**Story Warnings**: If you don't like slash, you better stop reading right here, the plot might also contain language and violence. So beware!

**Chapter Rating**: T

Chapter 4 – Decision was made

"Blaine lied to me" Kurt whispered into the phone inside the bus station, still waiting for the storm to end.

"Huh! I told you he'll come clean that he likes you!" Rachel said

"No. that's not what happened. I saw him with another guy" Kurt started crying. His eyes were scanning the bus station – still empty, no one can eavesdrop.

"Oh, I'm so sorry Kurt. It must feel terrible" Rachel was stunned

There was a silence for a few seconds and then she change attitude quickly: "Maybe he wanted you to see him to impress you? you know"

"I..I kind of peeked on him. he doesn't know about it" Kurt sighed.

"So he's withsomeone?" Rachel asked

"I'm not sure" he answered agitated.

"Look, don't get discouraged too fast. Why don't you go home and change, then meet Mercedes and me. We'll go get drinks and meet really cute boys - it'll be great!

Um, Look I have to go now. We're starting a rehearsal. Talk to you later"

Kurt hung up, still on the verge of a nervous breakdown

After a few minutes the bus arrived, and Kurt figured it would be best to get on it since the rain's not going to stop.

He paid the driverand sat down on a chair in the second row.

The old man that sat to his left immediately initiated conversation "hey kid, why do you look so sad?"

"Oh no. I'm fine" he lied.

"You have no reason to frown, boy. All life's ahead of you. Don't think too much about the past when you have such a long future to exploit"

"I'm sorry. You probably felt bad ignoring me when you saw that my eyes are red. But really, you don't have to try and help me"

"I get it" the man said as if he's leaving him to be, but he kept staring him through his glasses.

'I can't stand people feeling sorry for me. Do I look that miserable to others?'

Later that afternoon, Blaine couldn't stand the fact that he had a free weekend. How come nobody invited him anywhere?

He was hanging at the mall, looking for a jacket that would fit the new black shoes he had already bought. He wished to find something fashionable that wouldn't be too expensive for him.

"All the stores are pretty much the same, huh?" he told his friend Paul.

"You're right. Wanna try some other place?" Paul suggested, trying to please him.

"Yeah. But not today, It's getting late. Hey, you doing anything weekend?" Blaine asked confidently.

"I promised my dad I'd watch my little sisters"

"Never mind then. I just need to clear off my head a bit from all the studying, and all the problems regarding the Warblers." Blaine was tired so hetried stretching his hands up in the air "If you were there, you wouldn't believe how we're wasting our time on song selection instead of working"

"Cheer up" Paul warped his arm on Blaine's shoulders. "You have a great chance wining regionals this time" He tried to be supportive.

Blaine laughed "Paul, you don't have the slightest idea about music"

"Maybe. But I know a lot about you." Paul tried to kiss him, but Blaine turned away.

"Sorry. I'm just too bothered for that right now" he apologized, but Paul was offended by that.

"Blaine. You've changed. You used to be so enthused about everything. So..so accepting. And now you're suddenly worried about stupid things. Chill out!"

"You're right. I'm thinking too much. Let's go buy some candy!"

"You just gotta know that it means something. It's doing something to you, to your personality. Even though it feels like just having fun"

Kurt had his father's words echoing in his head on the way home. He wondered if Blaine did it just for the fun part, or was he expressing his feeling towards that man.

He was very disappointed with Blaine but even more, with himself for believing Blaine had never been in a relationship.

He went to his room: simultaneously trying to do his homework and looking at friend's pictures on Facebook. He didn't manage to finish them until dinner time, but it didn't bother him that much anyway.

After eating dinner, he could finally start dressing up. Kurt already picked his outfit yesterday. All that's left was fixing his hair and putting some aftershave. He's ready.

Someone knocked on his door, it was Finn. "Kurt, you have a phone call"

"Oh, who is it?" he said while combing his hair.

"Blaine" Kurt's heart began racing. 'What does he want? Does Blaine know that I saw him? To answer? Not to answer? I'm can't face him right now'

"Tell him I'm not at home" Kurt pleaded.

"O.K" Finn sounded embarrassed like the last thing he wanted was getting involved.

As he expected, Blaine also tried Kurt's cellphone, Kurt saw that he left him a voice message as he stepped out of the house.

He entered his car and pressed the button to hear it.

"Kurt" Blaine sounded cooler than ever. "What's up? Wanna go to a movie this weekend? Call me back"

'Better show this to Rachel and Mercedes too' he thought to himself.

He drove to Rachel's house, and the anxietyfollowed him there.

"Rachel, why aren't you dressed?" he was shocked as he saw Rachel opening the door in her pajamas.

"Come in Kurt. There was a bit of a plan change" she was actually pretty enthused about something. Kurt didn't understand.

"Sit down" she pointed on the couch in her living room. "Want some?" she handed over to him some of the popcorn that was on the coffee table.

"No thanks" he shared a little smile of apologize.

"Look" Rachel spoke so fast he didn't even had a chance to say a word in between.

"We both decided that it's stupid and pointless for you to go just anywhere looking for a date. You need some kind of gay hangout"

'But why did you decide that without telling me?' he thought and the answer was obvious even to him – so he wouldn't have time to refuse.

"I thought about it, but there's this problem that I'm underage-" he tried to object, Nervous from the thought of him being carded in a gay bar.

"I found the perfect place for you" she picked a piece of paper and handed it to him. Kurt read the address on the paper.

"It's a gay club that has a 16+ nights?"

"Yeah, it's a place for you to meet other people. It's not supposed to be scary. Mercedes and I are less likely to fit in there, but you'll meet there a lot of guys in your age"

"Fine. I'll go" he rested his hands on his knees.

"I know you'll be fine! Just take a few seconds to overcome the embarrassment before you go in, Oh, and try to repeat in your head like a mantra 'I'm amazing, I'm sexy' that usually helps!" she winked.

Kurt laughed "I'm not sure that's what will work for me"

"Then stop being unsure once and for all" she calmed him by laying her hands on his.

"I'm not going to sleep anytime soon so just feel free to call me until 2am, Oh and if you need encouragement – don't hesitate. That's what friends are for"

Kurt kissed Rachel goodbye, and entered his black Jeep car.

He knew this place, but that didn't change the fact that he was terrified to go inside. Especially with the girls bailing out like this…

'I'm doing this for me, I want to prove to myself that I do have the courage' he thought while driving on the highway.

It took him almost twenty minutes to get to the place, and another half an hour to dare and get out of the car.

He only hoped that he will have the courage to hit on other men, and decided that from now on – he believes in himself.

Kurt entered the place: it was loud and crowded as he expected. At first sight he thought the place is full and all the seats are taken. He was almost about to give up when a staff member approached him and whispered to him "there's a seat on the bar, cutie. Loosen up" he followed the man and saw him entering the bar to prepare drinks. "It's your first time here, right?"

"um, no" he tried to sound confident, like he promised himself he will.

"Want me to take your order?"

"No. No, um. Maybe just a glass of water?"

"Coming right up, kid. So..are you waiting for someone here?" the bartender showed special interest in Kurt and decided to keep talking with him while serving orders to other costumers.

"Are you single?" the man asked.

Kurt considered his words "Actually, yes"

"Oh that's so cute" Kurt blushed.

"Most of the guys here are singles too, I can offer you this guy" he pointed at the teenager that sat in the far corner, drinking something with a lot of ice. "Go talk to him!"

The guy's face was buried in the darkness and Kurt couldn't see his facial features.

"Thanks. I'll think about it" Kurt decided to wait for the guy to lift his head.

"! By the time you're done thinking about it, he'll be gone. Go now without thinking!" he ordered.

"I can't" Kurt shook his head. "I know I shouldn't make a big deal out of it but it doesn't feel right"

"Yes you can! Don't say you can't do something you haven't tried, come on! Now get up!"

Kurt stood up. Clutching his bag in his hands and walked slowly and cautiously towards the man.

"Excuse me" Kurt forced himself into speaking. "Can I buy you a drink?"

"Hell you can!" the guy laughed "is this your first time here?"

'Why does everyone keep saying that to me? Do I have a sticker on my face with the word 'pathetic'?' Kurt was really annoyed.

"No, it's not. What your n-" Kurt was shocked that he didn't even finished his sentence. The guy had a huge tattoo of what seemed like a daemon on his left arm.

He returned back to the bartender as he heard laughter raging behind him.

"I have to go, how much for the water I ordered?" he asked in a hurry

"It's tap water, it's on the house" he said in a tone of 'wasn't that obvious'

"Thanks and goodbye" Kurt said from afar, searching for the exit.

"Wait, kid!" some guy he didn't know called him kid, and that was by far, the most humiliating word anyone could ever call him.

'I'm not gonna answer' the tears were starting to settle in his eyes, he held them back until he got to his car.

'How was it?' Kurt saw Rachel's text message when he walked the parking lot.

He decided to call her back from his car "not the place for me" he concluded.

"What happened?" she asked half asleep.

"Just didn't see anyone there who'd fit for me"

"I see, don't get upset. You'll find your prince somewhere else" she said softly like a mother

Kurt decided to evade from talking about what has happened to him in the bar. It was still to fresh and too painful.

"Rachel, only you can understand how broken I feel. I was so secure when we were best friends and now I think he's looking for more than that-"

The Black car entered the highway and Rachel spoke to him from the Handsfree.

"Look, the most reasonable thing to do right now is to let it go for the time being. See if you can live without him"

'I wish what I said now could have actually made sense' Rachel thought as the image of Finn rose in her mind. 'I have to cheer him up somehow'

"I think that if he really is in love with you and you're not just a one night stand he'll keep trying to reach you" she explained.

"I agree. But I wish I knew why he lied to me-"

"Who knowswhat's going through his mind, what you told me today still sounds unbelievable. But think about yourself first, just take your time to decide, you know, make sure you really love him although his actions"

Rachel changed back the subject "So you consider tonight to be a bad or a good experience. You know, since you didn't find anyone..not even a friend"

'Maybe he didn't try too hard' she thought.

"All I can say is that I'm glad I went there since the next visit won't be my first time anymore" he actually did mean what he said "I'll know how to get along"

The black Jeep slowed down as he entered his driveway.

"I'm home Rachel, thanks for talking to me"

"I hope that cheered you up a bit. Goodnight"

Kurt checked the watch in his car: it was 2:45 AM. He stepped out of his car, locked it and put his leather jacket back on.

He was searching for the right key in the bundle to open his house when he saw a black figure on the lawn of his neighbors.

A man slightly older than him was sitting on his house entrance stairs, embracing his knees with his hands.

Kurt came closer to him and stared at him to see what he's doing there, and was surprised to see that he didn't move at all. He thought about the option of ignoring him and going to bed but then recalled all the times that he was in distress and no one even noticed that he's calling for help.

'You're always the most desperate when you're calling silently for help' he thought.

He reached the fence that surrounded the lawn and drew the man's attention "Is everything alright?"

"Kurt" the man stood up surprised while Kurt tried to match his familiar face to a name.

'Let's see, he's tall, has short black hair and bristles, and the other roommate he's living with is called Tracy' he tried to search the past in his head as fast as he can. 'He's still waiting for me, better say something.'

"Hi, you seem like something's bothering you. So I thought I'd better-" the man interrupted immediately.

"Yes, something did happen but I'm not really in a mood to talk about it. You don't really know me, so.."

"I may not know you Thomas, but I understand you must be feeling very uncomfortable right now. You're eyes are all red from crying and you look stressed"

"Tracy just broke up with me, twenty minutes ago. I don't even know why" he threw his hands in the air recklessly.

"Oh, no! I'm so sorry" he said a bit shocked.

" I wanted some time alone to think about it because she didn't say a thing that might've explained this! How am I supposed to know what happened?"

"Let's go into your house. I'll make you a cup of coffee" Thomas nodded and stood up.

'What a mess. No wonder she wanted to leave' was Kurt's first though as he entered. He gazed at the messy living room: books, papers, clothes, everything was scattered on the floor. The T.V was still on showing a late-night sitcom, and the paintings on the walls were the complete opposite, Kurt thought they were beautiful.

In the kitchen, above the dining table was a painting of a colorful peacock that tried to make his way between hundreds of other peacocks that were drawn only in black and white only.

"It's beautiful" he pointed at the painting "did you draw it?"

"Yes, it took me months" Thomas said proudly and sat down on a chair.

Kurt approached to the kettle in order to put it on, but Thomas stopped him "I know where everything is, let me make it"

He stood up and took out from an upper cabinet two mugs "how much sugar do you want?"

"I rather you make one for yourself first" Kurt suggested.

"It doesn't matter, O.K, So Kurt, tell me what'cha doing now? Still in high school, right?"

"Yes" he answered as if he's not so happy about it.

"You seem so anxious, lighten up. Don't look at me as a grown up just cause I'm five years older than you. Actually don't think about anything, you've just agreed to participate with me in the weirdest conversation ever : two people who barely know each other pour their hearts. It's even better than a psychologist, huh?"

'He's wrecked from the inside, just like me'

"So… have you tried calling her?" Kurt really wanted to cheer the man. And not just because a sparkle in him will light Kurt's heart too, but also because he liked the new "self" he just made up. Now he's strong. Helping people out is better than being deprived and getting everyone's mercy.

"Yes, and she's obviously evading from answering" Thomas muttered.

_'Just like me'_

"How about asking any of her friends if they know?" Kurt suggested.

"It 2 AM, I'd rather not call anyone. Just need to find a way to pass the night"

_'Tryin' to banish the same thoughts every night'_

"You were really in love with her?" Kurt asked tenderly.

"Huh? what a wierd question" he regretted his words when he saw the expression on Kurt's face. "Sorry. Well, I was going to propose to her in a few weeks from now.."

_'Blaine Warbbler – would you like to-'_

"Can't believe this is happening" he leaned his forehead on his hand.

"I'm guessing you did something that hurt her feelings"

_'Fireplace burning with rage and passion'_

An awkward silence. Kurt nodded immediately in order to conceal the fact he wasn't really listening.

"O.K I'll ask it more bluntly, did you cheat on her?" Kurt said seriously

"No!" Thomas said and then settled into thoughts.

"Did you do anything that she might interpret as cheating?" Kurt sighed.

"You understand women pretty well don't you?" Tomas smirked and came to the realization. "Are you gay?" he asked tactlessly and rushed to add. "Not that I have a problem with that

"Yes, I am" he answered proudly, brushing his hair.

Thomas thought about the whole thing for a few seconds and then decided to change a subject "Do you have a boyfriend?"

"I knew you'd say that" he exhaled and added "but no worries, I'm not hitting on you"

"Good"

"And no I don't have a boyfriend" Kurt put both cups in the sink and started washing them.

"But you're in love with someone" Thomas guessed.

"How'd you know?" he said surprised.

"There's this weird gleam in your eyes as if you're yearning for something impossible"

_'I wonder if Blaine saw that 'gleam' thing'_

"Well the gleam must be mistaken, because I'm so over him"

"That's what we all say, so I'm not buying. Come on. Who is he?"

Kurt wasn't sure that he wants to get into all the private details.

"Sorry I'm worn out, how about we talk about it tomorrow? I want to know how it ended up with your girlfriend"

"No problem. Kurt Hummel, right? I'll add you on Facebook"

Kurt headed towards the door.

"Kurt, thanks for the support. It's not obvious that someone has the patience to hear you out. Goodnight"

Kurt left the house and thought of Thomas whose going to sleep alone in his bed, turning over a hundred times to each side, because of things he doesn't understand.

_'Just like me'_

Dear Diary,

It's 4 AM and I'm still unable to sleep. Paul suggested coming over to my house tonight but it just didn't feel right. I think that he's fallen in love with me and I'm only making it worsefor him since I gave myself in to him. I feel like I can only be truly honest here, saying that I had no intentions to take advantage of him.

I have to admit it was the best experience I've had in my life so far, and I do tend to take risks. But I have to make the decision If I should end this between us or not.

'I'll still have other partners, even without him' he thought to himself.

'Problem is. The more I do it, the weaker I feel in retrospect'

He continued to write: I'm afraid that I am already addicted. I crave the feeling of being desired, and the passion of others towards me is the fuel that empowers me.

Now's my time to decide if I can live without all this, Kurt.

You seem so far away right now: looking at me with empty eyes, like I don't exist, ignoring me at school, deleting my text messages. I wish I hadn't tried to help you.

Just trying to figure out what you want…

'Another gloomy afternoon' Kurt gazed outside from the windows.

The lunch break was about to end, which means he should be going now to a rehearsal of the Warblers.

The meeting started off with the usual discussion about songs for regionals. Kurt could barely hear what they were saying in the conversation. Every single thought in is head was about the best way to ignore Blaine, and about keeping a serious frown on his face as long as he's near.

Blaine kept smiling to his direction all the time, but Kurt kept his facial expressions locked tight, as if he isn't noticing him.

When Kurt saw everyone raising their hands in total consensus he quickly raised his too, he didn't want anyone to ask him what's his opinion about something he wasn't listening to.

They all tried to sing together the new song that was elected, luckily Kurt knew it's lyrics.

The three seniors that were in the council started giving the right beat to help all the rest join along as the accompaniment for Blaine who started singing the lead.

_"Once I was a selfish fool, who never understood, never looked inside myself though on the outside, I looked good!"_ he pointed on himself with his hands while singing.

The other members of the Warblers started making up the right choreography around him while humming and repeating his last words.

_"Then we met and you made me the man I am today, baby I'm in love with you no matter what you say"_ Kurt couldn't help being impressed by the way Blaine changed the words to fit in for him.

He also noticed that Blaine didn't sing like any other singer, he was more of a leader. He felt like each word that Blaine was singing was also a hint as to what should happen next. Somehow without planning it, everyone understood that they should turn around Blaine, who was now sitting on the black couch, starting the chorus.

_"Without love life is like the seasons with no summer without love life is rock 'n' roll without a drummer"_ Blaine kept building the song into his climax.

'I wish I had half of his charisma' though David 'No one else can hold such hard song that effortlessly'

_"Baby, I'll be yours forever 'cause I never wanna be without love love love. Promise, never set me free. No, I ain't lyin' never set me free, No, no, no!"_

'Am I just falling for him?' Jeff wondered while singing in the background 'I've never felt like this, like I want to be close to him and get to really know him. He's just singing. So why am I feeling so good about myself?'

_"If I'm left without my babydoll I don't know what I'll do, I think I've got to break out so that I can get my hands on you"_ the choreography became more dramatic, and Blaine managed somehow to sing while hopping around between everyone.

Blaine leaned his back on the desk of the council, singing from a state of trance _"And girl, if I can't touch you and I'm gonna lose control honey, you're my black white knight I've found my blue-eyed soul"_

Kurt didn't want to stay aside, because everyone will notice that, so he sang silently with all the rest, refusing to give himself totally to the enchantment everyone else was in.

'I don't know what's going in his head, but he's gonna rule the world someday with that over-confident attitude' Kurt though although he didn't want to admit it.

The song was about to end and everyone joined Blaine in the last chorus _"Darling you have best believed me, never leave me without love"_

On the last second of the song, Kurt felt unexpected warmth rising from his shoulders and running through his veins. He didn't flinch when he saw it was Blaine's arm. He was too confused, and therefore from an expression of enjoyment he changed immediately his face to total emptiness.

'That's right Blaine, I can be unreadable' he thought for a moment.

"That was a successful rehearsal guys" Wes concluded. "It's still not decided whether we'll pick this song for regionals or not, so I want you all to think of other options for tomorrow's meeting" he raised his hands as a sign that everyone's dismissed.

Kurt hurried to step into the corridor but Blaine stood in front of him.

"Kurt, we have to talk. It can't go on like this. I've called you and texted you and now I ask you to spare me a minute so I can apologize" Kurt didn't answer.

Blaine didn't let it show, but he was definitelywrecked from the mean way Kurt stared him right it the eyes.

'He looks at me as if I've done something awful. I don't get it. Everyone else said what I did was a masterpiece'

"O.K, talk" Kurt sputtered

"You know, I really care about you, and I'm sorry if I have ever done anything that hurt you" he searched inside Kurt a place of emotion, he wanted to light it on so it will spread inside him and replace the madness in his eyes and his clenched mouth.

"Sorry, I don't believe you" Kurt muttered and ran towards the stairs without even waiting for an answer.

'Now I'm positive, there must be something else he found about me. I wonder which of my secrets he revealed.'

When he returned back home, Kurt opened his Facebook to see if someone tagged him in a picture or wrote on his wall.

'Thomas added me' he noticed immediately.

He decided to write him a private message: "I'm waiting to hear from you if you managed to contact Tracy or not, or if you're still bummed".

Kurt also decided to peek in his profile, and he saw a lot of pictures of him with his ex-girlfriend.

'Is it certain he's not gay? Or at least bi? He seems like such a romantic guy '

Dear Diary,

I've decided I'm not giving up on Kurt. I really feel we're inseparable and it's mainly my fault that he won't speak to me. He probably knows about me and Paul, but I'm going to make it up to him. He wants romance and that's what he'll get. I won't take no for an answer.

Thomas signed onto Facebook chat.

"Kurt thanks for cheering me up yesterday, I was so pleased when you said you like my paintings it actually distracted me a bit from my problems" he wrote and added a smiley.

"You clearly have talent" he answered. "Did you hear from her?"

"Yeah, she didn't answer me herself but I called her best friend and she's staying at her apartment. Her friend said she doesn't want to see me anytime soon, because she's having a nervous breakdown, I'm indefinite if it's a good idea to go and see her against her will. She wouldn't let me in anyway" Kurt read the whole paragraph and replied fast.

"Maybe you should leave her alone for 2 or 3 days until she calms down a bit. There's nothing you can do right now even if you did know her reasons to act like this"

"You may be right. I'm starting to think it's lost since she wrote in her status that she's no longer in a relationship"

"Guess this must mean she's very serious about this" Kurt implied

"Man, you've helped me so much. I want to thank you somehow, wanna hangout somewhere?" surprised and confused Kurt wrote that he agrees.

"Too bad strip club is out of the question. It could have been very helpful right now"

'If thought he's romantic I'm taking it back!' Kurt thought.

"Hi, um, I'm here for Kurt" it took Burt about ten seconds to inspect the man from top to bottom: He wore a white shirt and black pants, his shoes were polished and a bouquet of roses was in his hands.

"He left about an hour ago. Blaine, right?" Burt remembered how he visited him in his garage a few weeks ago.

"Yes sir" he nodded

"You want to come in and wait for him?"

"Do you know when he's supposed to come back?" Blaine inquired "Or where did he went?"

"Yeah, he mentioned something about going to the mall. But I really have to ask you what's going on." Burt seemed a bit worried.

"Kurt told me you two aren't together"

"Well, he didn't lie" Blaine smiled shyly. "Oh, the roses? Well, I like your son and I hope we can get together" he saw a threatening gaze in his eyes and added "Of course, if that's O.K with you"

Burt took a deep breath "I just want him to be happy, if that's included, I approve" he still looked serious.

"I'm glad to hear. Well I'm gonna look for him…so..thank you and goodbye" Blaine waved to him and stepped into his car.

"Man, I can't believe you're winning this thing" Thomas commented when Kurt threw his last ball and unsurprisingly knocked down all the pins.

"I used to play bowling with my dad since I was a kid, so you can say I'm experienced" Kurt said with satisfaction and pride.

"You were supposed to cheer me up. I want a rematch!" Thomas complained.

"It's just a game. Loosen up"

Thomas wondered if Kurt's always been perky like this.

"You wanna grab something to eat?" Kurt suggested.

"Umm" Thomas hesitated "I wanted to visit the arcade too"

"We'll go there later! Let's eat while it's still open here" he insisted.

The two of them bought Hot dogs and fries and sat down in the nearest table.

"Now it's your turn to tell me about that love of yours" Thomas leaned forward with his head and placed his hands on the table.

'And he likes gossip! What a weird straight!'

"O.K, are you sure you want to hear about my love life?" he said as if it's really boring.

Somehow Thomas managed to eat and speak without choking "Why not? Maybe I'll have an idea how to help you out with that guy you're trying to forget"

"Right, just don't ever tell this to anyone else" Kurt lowered his voice.

Thomas nodded in response.

Kurt told him his story, but left aside the details he preferred to forget.

"Problem is, he's popular, too popular among other men. Maybe he just wants me on the list of people he's been with" Kurt's voice became even lower and lighter, and almost cracked in the end of his explanation.

"Well, it really is complicated. But you should try being with him, I mean, what the hack? Maybe you'll end up seeing that he's a lousy kisser" Thomas laughed.

"No. I actually know from a very reliable source that he's a great kisser" Kurt added. "But that's not what I care about. I'm not sure you can understand me but I think I love his soul, so I don't care about the physical" he blushed.

"So what are you planning to do about it?" Thomas tried to be practical.

"Nothing, he can't be with me and with another man at the same time" said Kurt sincerely.

"Don't you think you're acting stupid? At first you tell me he's your soulmate, and then you're saying you won't be doing anything about it?"

"All I'm saying is that I need some more time to think about it" Kurt was waiting for Thomas to finish eating.

"Most importantly, I need to see if I can trust him again, because he lied to me"

They both got up from their seats, took the leftovers to the trash and continued walking to the Arcade.

Kurt wasn't a big fan of videogames, but he was so grateful inside him for spending time with Thomas that he didn't mind playing all these manly games where he had to shoot as many people as he can or drive a race car as fast as possible. He finally had a good time with a friend, like he hasn't had in a long time.

After an hour of playing they earned a bunch of tokens and went to redeem their prize.

"I don't want any of the prizes, take whatever you like" Thomas said.

"Oh, can I choose the bunny?" Kurt said half laughing and half serious, waiting for approval for that unmanly prize.

'He's standing there with some other guy, and he's handing him a big doll. Who's this guy he's hanging out with?' Blaine stood at the entrance of the place and gazed at them.

'Kurt's tapping on his back, as some sort of appreciation. Are they together?' Blaine changed a spot and followed them, peeking through the outside windows.

'Bingo! Mister Warbler's peeking at me' Kurt smirked.

'Now we're tie' a feeling of a total triumph caused him to shiver, he finally felt that he's starting to get over that unforgettable moment.

"Kurt Why are you hugging me?" Thomas resented but he didn't move away. "I guess you didn't know that men never hug each other in public?" Thomas tried to understand.

"I did know that, I'm not so much younger than you" Kurt preached "But I swear it was for a good cause" he apologized.

"You're creeping me out, let's go back home before someone sees us together" he whispered to his ear.

"I think he already did" Kurt said like a real winner.

A/N: Yeah, I know it took me forever to post this, so thank you for your patience!

Thanks to all of you who subscribed/faved the story! I love you so much and I hoped you enjoyed this chapter as well.


	5. Dreaming or Not?

Klaine - Picture Us Together

Chapter 5 – Dreaming or not

It's a warm Sunday. Kurt just woke up and turned the curtains aside: families walked happily on the street, three kids that passed by were eating ice cream and laughing, even the birds didn't mind singing.

Still, Kurt felt like staying at home, stretching the perfectness of the day a little longer.

He was looking for something that he himself wasn't so sure what it was but he still kept passing between rooms searching for it.

'Oh, Finn's room' he peeked through the keyhole and saw that he was still asleep. 'I've gotta stop with this habit of peeking, it can turn out pretty bad' he ran up the stairs to the attic.

The only room that Carol allowed to be left messy…

High bookshelves loaded with books and statues were gathering dust, folded carpets that had no use right now, old board games and the thing Kurt was unknowingly looking for – an easel and a color palette.

He decided to take them down to his room because it was too hot to work in the attic.

He put down the easel between his bed and his closet, locked the door and set his imagination free.

Kurt hadn't painted for a long time, so he slowly tried to remember the techniques that he once learned.

The first three Layers were just a mess, colors from all kinds that had no connection and didn't make a picture, but on the third he started drawing some dim lines of black and brown.

Each smear he did with his paintbrush felt as if the whole room is gaining its colors, he continued to connect the lines without planning into details, letting himself to dive in.

A second Kurt appeared from inside the painting, just as he wanted, but the drawing was much happier than its creator.

He drew himself in a black ballet body stocking with fabric shoes and a tie. He tried to draw a teacher standing behind him and helping him to grasp his right feet with his hand but the teacher really looked Blainish, with deep powerful eyes, smooth hair and a tiny heart melting smile.

At first he wanted to delete the teacher figure, making a white background instead, but he couldn't.

"Kurt! Can you come here for a sec?" his father yelled from downstairs.

Kurt opened the door and leaned forward "Just a second Dad!"

Instead of redrawing, he hid the painting inside his large closet hoping that the colors will be dried on the canvas.

He took off his pajamas and wore short pants for the first time this year.

While he went down the stairs he could smell the breakfast that Carol made.

Finn was there too, sitting at the dining table, finishing his scrambled egg.  
'How long was I locked up there?'

"Hi Kurt" Finn greeted him as he took his plate into the sink "gotta run" he grasped his bag and opened the door "see you later"

"Kurt, it 12 am, are you sure you don't want to eat something before lunch?" Burt asked worryingly.

"I'll make myself a peanut butter sandwich, is that the reason you've called me?" he seemed a bit confused.

"You know exactly what I wanted to talk to you about" he said while Kurt took the peanut butter jar from a shelf and spread it on two pieces of Toasted bread.

"If it's another one of "the talks" I'm leaving" he said while pointing the smeared knife at his dad as a joke.

"No, it's not" Burt smiled humbly "Sit down. There are two things I need to ask you"

Kurt pulled a chair while Burt put the breakfast leftovers in the fridge and joined him.

"First thing you should know. Or maybe you already do know" he corrected himself. "Blaine was here last night. He asked me if you're home-"

"Oh" Kurt didn't know what to say.

"-While he was holding a bouquet of red roses that he was planning to give you"

Kurt Blushed "That's…" he sighed "that sounds serious" he leaned back on his chair, still examining the situation, considering what's the right thing to say.

"I can see you're a bit surprised" Burt set loose a little smile "You don't feel the same way for him?"

"I..I don't know" Kurt wasn't able to tell his father the truth, the pictures of Blaine clutching another man were still tangled deep in his head, attached in too many ties with other events of the last few weeks.

"I understand that you're a bit confused about him since you're sort of best friends in school, but maybe it's best to talk with him and explain how you feel"

'What can I tell him? That he broke my heart?' Kurt thought to himself. 'I can't believe he's trying to buy me back with red roses…he knows me too well to conquer my soul, and he'll succeed sooner or later'

"Kurt? Are you listening to me?" Burt raised his voice to penetrate into Kurt's thoughts.

As Burt gazed at Kurt's gloomy eyes, he felt that something's definitely wrong here, but Kurt wouldn't be the one to talk to him about it.

'It looks like he's holding up his eyes from pouring up here' Burt admitted to himself while thinking of a way to cheer up the boy.

"O.K , now let's talk about something nice" he said, still staring at Kurt's eye, trying to follow them to get to his thoughts. "We're throwing a surprise party for Finn's birthday on Sunday, and we need your help"

"I thought his birthday is on Wednesday" Kurt muttered.

"Exactly, that will be the surprise"

Kurt raised his head from the table with contentment "you want me to organize the decorations?" his eyes glittered.

"You said it, I was hoping you and Carol could go today to do all the shopping, And I'm relying on you that you'll do all the phone calls to his friends from that school club of his"

"Sure, I'll take care of everything!" he giggled shyly while tearing up a piece of paper and making a to-do list: people ,food, accessorize, activities..

'I'll make something epic.'

****

_Mark, I hate doing this through a text message but you're not answering the phone, I have to_

'No, it's too cruel to break up with someone on SMS, even for me..' he thought and deleted the whole bundle of words

'I'll call him one last time' he decided, but again no answer. Blaine cleared his throat and forced himself to leave a message.

"Hi, you're not answering your phone" he tried to sound as usual, not giving in that something's wrong. "So… I just wanted to tell you that we need to talk. Please call me back"

One last phone call to make: the hardest one. Blaine really didn't want to do it on the phone, but he knew that meeting him will only make things worse.

"Hi, Paul!" he said in his regular perky tone

"Hey, Blaine, what's going on?" he asked.

"Nothing special. How was your weekend?" Blaine wanted the breakup to be as easy as possible, and he was still considering the words he should use.

"You mean how was the pool party that you were supposed to be in yesterday? Because it was quite boring without you, I admit it" Blaine could hear him sigh.

"Paul, I want to ask you as a.. a good friend of yours, are you seeing other men?"

"Why? Are you in for serious commitment and all that other bullshit?" he sounded annoyed.  
"No, I mean…not exactly. I..I like you Paul, very much, but I'm not sure where this is going.." he said with all the hesitation he could muster.

"Well, you can have doubts, I guess… It's O.K, just answer me this one question, or maybe actually two: one, are you having a good time with me? And the second, do you think I'm good in bed?" he paused, giving Blaine time to think about it.

"If you'd asked me, I would have answered yes for both of them. I love you" Paul whispered.

"I..I.." this is going to be harder than he expected.

"O.K Paul, I'll just have to spill out the truth. I do have a great time hanging out with you, all those nights when we were walking around drunk in the middle of the night with no purpose..." The memory flashed in his head, wounding him.

"And I think we have a unique chemistry in bed, even though with every men it's different somehow, you were special to me, and I was dazed by the way you made me feel each time" Blaine lowered his voice, trying to prevent himself from breaking. "But we both know that it has nothing to do with…love"

"You're in love with someone else? Because I don't mind if want to be with someone else too. We're both sharing ourselves, you know.."

"Yes, I know. But I fell for someone who's so tender and sweet, that I have to dedicate myself only to him…"

Awkward silence "I'm sorry."

"I see, just so you know, for you it might not have been true love, but for me, it was" Blaine didn't want to believe that.

"Paul, you are seeing men other than me, do you feel true love with them too?"

Blaine knew he was right, but it didn't make the situation better, Paul hung up.

'If only a person could know whether he's doing the right thing or not. That's the real problem, there is no "right thing", nothing's right for all of us'

He lied back on his bed, thinking about the other men he's been with: did any of them had feelings for him? What kind of feeling is it when you can as easily be replaced with another?

_Dear Diary,_

Today's the big day!

In the last few days I've learned that the best way to overcome my feelings is to help someone else. I think that Finn will be very pleased when he'll see all the time and efforts me and Carol put into this.

We decided to celebrate in our house, while my Dad and Carol will go to the theater, I've already invited everyone from glee club and arranged some nice party games just in case. The Karaoke never fails, since you know, they're a glee club.

I also had some amazing "bonding time" with Carol when we bought the food and some other decorations, I've never imagined that shopping with her could work out, she actually believes in shopping for fun.

A message flashed on Kurt's computer screen while he was still writing.

'It's Thomas' he glanced at the message.

"Are you here?" he wrote.

"Yes, what's going on?" Kurt replied and read what he wrote in his Diary while waiting for Thomas to respond.

"I just found out the truth about Tracy, wanna come over and hear?"

Kurt didn't really feel like leaving his room right now and was thinking about refusing.

The screen flashed again.

"Maybe you could give me some advice and you'll tell me what's going on with you"

Kurt glanced at his watch, it was 6:40pm, Finn's surprise Party is at 8:30.

"I'm a bit busy today, but you're lucky that you live near me and that I'm curious what's going on with you too!"

"I'm making coffee for myself, do you want one too?" he wrote, but Kurt was already on his way down the stairs.

No one was in the house right now. He locked the door from the outside and crossed the road.

After knocking twice he realized that Thomas left the door open for him.

'The apartment still messy' it was like revisiting the memory of day he met him.

"Kurt! Make yourself at home, I'm coming right away! Sit on one of the couches"

Kurt removed the dirty clothes from the couch to the coffee table and sat down.

Thomas gave Kurt his Mug of coffee and sat on the other couch without moving the mess that was on it.

"You know, our hangout two days ago made me feel so relieved. It was like, three hours without thinking about Tracy and the engagement and everything. Except for the part you were acting strange and you didn't want to explain yourself, well I'm waiting. Pour it boy"

"No, we don't have much time today, first you tell me what happened with your ex-girlfriend!" he said with excitement and took a sip from his coffee, it was sweeter than he expected.

"Okay, but we're not done with you" he warned him.

"Since, of course, Tracy didn't want to tell me herself her reasons for blowing up our almost-engagement, I asked a few common friends of ours to help me find out what happened, and today one of them called me." He placed his empty cup on the table.

"And?"

"Most stupid reason ever, believe me. Her best friend told her that I'm cheating on her"

"Is it the one she's staying at her place right now?" Kurt remembered their last chat about it.

"Yes, that annoying bitch. Apparently she found out that I want to propose to Tracy and she decided to blow it all up" Thomas played with his fingers, emphasizing his stress.

"Are you most positively sure you didn't cheat on her? That might include any interaction with another girl, that her friend might interpret as cheating" Kurt explained.

"That really doesn't make sense! I see girls all the time at work, I can't avoid them, and I don't want to" he yelled "I don't want to get back with her anyway. It's too late now. I'm just curious why does her friend hates me so much that she decides to lie and ruin my life"

"You're a great guy. If Tracy doesn't realizes that herself, and she rather believe her friend then you should probably move on" Kurt suggested and checked his clock, it was 7:15.

"That's O.K Kurt, there is no one ultimate solution for all of this, I just wanted to share, that's all" he leaned back on the couch.

"Now the hug thing, did you see the guy you love that day? Do tell" he demanded.

"Well, apparently he was following us the whole time, and I wanted him.." Kurt stopped and tried to clarify it for himself "I wanted to prove him something'' Kurt admitted.

Kurt didn't want to get into more details than that. He got up and turned into the door.

"I really have to go now, I don't wanna be late. Be sure to keep me posted with any news from her" he turned the key to open the entrance door.

"Sure, thanks for coming! It was really nice having you around, we'll stay in touch!" Thomas waved goodbye as he picked the coffee mugs to the kitchen.

"Bye Thomas!"

"Goodbye Kurt, have fun!"

As Kurt stepped into the lawn of his house and searched for his house keys he saw his cellphone glowing 'Another message from Blaine'

'Are you here?' the message read. Kurt said to himself that he'll answer him later, but he never did.

Tina, Artie and Mike arrived first. They had promised that they'll be here early to help him organize.

They started by moving the dining table out of the way, so they'll have more free space, while Tina brought five more chairs from the second floor into the living room.

The three guests started inflating balloons and argued if they should hang them up while Rachel arrived and started giving everyone commands.

"That's O.K Rachel, we're already done with the decorations" Kurt lied "but I can really use your help in the kitchen" he said and dragged her far from the others.

"We have here five kinds of pizzas and only one oven to bake them. If you want to help, put two of them in each time and make sure that you don't burn them" he said and ran outside the kitchen to help the others.

When he came back, Sam was already in his living room, checking the book shelves that were there and Tina was greeting Mercedes at the door.

The girls hugged tightly and then both of them went to help the boys with the balloons.

The realization suddenly fell on Kurt, he missed the glee club, true, he stayed in touch with most of the girls, and he had Finn's singing on a daily basis while he was showering, but it was still very different.

He thought to himself that the reason may be that in Glee he felt more like a team player, and in Dalton he's still kind of "the new guy" that needs to find his place.

Kurt felt a heartwarming emotion grasping him when he saw that there was a huge pile of presents covering up his own gift for Finn.

'I wonder how Finn will feel about it' he was excited than ever but mostly proud of himself that he organized the whole deal.

The time flew when Kurt was busy talking to his old school friends. Kurt noticed in his watch that Finn should arrive any minute with the rest of the gang that had to drag him back home with a lame excuse.

It was all perfectly coordinated and when he turned off the lights everyone waited for Finn's entrance to yell surprise for him.

Kurt noticed that his step brother looked pretty stunned when everyone hugged him and wished him a happy birthday.

Quinn, Puck, Santana and Brittany were all standing behind Finn, waiting for him to enter, and then ran towards the food like everybody else.

The hours passed so fast, and around midnight Kurt's parents entered silently, without disturbing the Karaoke marathon, waving to everyone and then going upstairs to their bedroom.

***

"Kurt!" Finn called him while he was pouring himself a drink.

"Thanks for setting everything up, I know you did most of the work here, and was really an awesome surprise" Kurt was smiling, happy to know that his efforts were truly appreciated.

"Listen" Finn approached Kurt's ear and whispered "I thought you should know that I just saw Blaine outside our house"

"What?" Kurt said in a voice faint than a whisper. He knew he should have answered his message.

He closed his eyes worryingly because he really didn't want to deal with this issue right now, when he was exhausted from all the arrangements he made today.

"Kurt" Finn continued "He's freezing outside, don't you think we should let him in?"

"Do you want him in your party?" Kurt asked in a defiant tone.

"I don't know, it's kind of the end of it" Finn looked around him : Tina, Mercedes, Artie, Mike and Sam already left, Rachel was still looking for a Barbra Streisand song in the Karaoke Program, Brittany and Santana fell asleep on each other, and Quinn and Puck were immersed in a quiet conversation.

A loud voice brought Finn back from his thoughts "Do what you want, Finn, it's your party" Kurt sent him a reluctant gaze and went up the stairs.

Finn decided that it's best to hint everyone that the party is over: He thanked them all separately for coming, and implied that whoever insists to stay will be forced to help clean everything up.

Everyone rushed outside, except for Rachel who hesitated and looked as if she was never planning to leave, but when she saw that Quinn is approaching Finn for a tight hug, she said a weak goodbye and left.

"Do you wanna stay for the night?" Finn suggested to his girlfriend.

"I don't mind" Quinn smiled at him as they went upstairs.

Kurt opened his window and looked down: Blaine was definitely there and he was holding a big black object that Kurt couldn't make out in the dark.

It was a different Blaine. Kurt spotted a shy smile that didn't suit the charismatic man he knew at his first day at Dalton, he seemed fragile and truthful, not the Blaine that was consistently happy about everything.

The wind blew fiercely that night and he was forcibly trying to fix a little curl in his hair.

Kurt closed his eyes and laughed 'how things have changed' he thought. Not too long ago, he felt that he should be running after Blaine in order to win his attention but now, Blaine wants him so badly that he is willing to stand outside, in the cold and wait for an invitation from Kurt.

'Or maybe..' another idea spread in Kurt's mind "Maybe he's just looking for the right moment to apologize?'

"Kurt! Kurt!" Blaine yelled recklessly "I knew you'd be in your room" he looked up "I know you're avoiding me, I got it, but I'm still not moving from here until we finally get to talk"

Blaine looked a bit pale at the light of the street lamp, and apparently he took the black weird shape out of its case: a wooden mandolin that he held with both hands.

"It's a bit late, but since you didn't invite me to your party, I'm just gonna stand here and sing something for you" he shivered "I've combined two of your favorite songs"

He started by playing his mandolin and sang softly, like he only wants Kurt to hear him:

_"I wish we could talk  
About the things we've gone through  
Though it's hurting me  
Now it's history"_

In the chorus he couldn't whisper anymore because he had to belt out the notes, but Kurt had to admit to himself that it enchanted him, he stared reluctantly at Blaine, concealing his confusion.

_"The winner takes it all  
The loser standing small  
Beside the victory  
That's his destiny"_

Blaine Pulled on the last "y" syllable and played with his mandolin an instrumental bridge that combined the two songs.

_"Daylight, I must wait for the sunrise"_ he continued lightly like he's inviting Kurt to enter into a dream.

_"I must think of a new life  
And I mustn't give in"_

Blaine continued his serenade while looking into Kurt's bright eyes, as if he's trying to soften him.

_"When the dawn comes  
Tonight will be a memory too  
And a new day will begin"_

"Kurt, I want to be yours" he moved his lips without pronouncing the words, but Kurt understood everything, and held himself from shutting the window right now.

"I love you. Please come here so we can talk" Blaine pleaded with eyes full of regret.

"I'm not sure about this, I just… can't believe you" Kurt answered and tossed himself on the bed, plunging into thoughts.

Blaine's song reached him through the open window, filling his mind with memories of them together from the past and also imaginations and fantasies from their future.

_  
"Burnt out ends of smoky days  
The stale cold smell of morning  
The streetlamp dies, another night is over  
Another day is dawning"_

It was inevitable.  
Soon enough Kurt found himself running downstairs while the lyrics are still reaching into him in the darkness.

As he opened the door he saw Blaine putting aside the mandolin in its case. Kurt left the door opened and approached him.

_"Touch me"_ Kurt held Blaine's hand, and felt like the entire universe was turning around them, a surge of energy burst into Kurt's body that moment, giving him the ability to truly believe for a second that everything's just perfect.

_"It's so easy to leave me  
All alone with the memory  
Of my days in the sun"_

Kurt packed up Blaine's mandolin, closed the clasps and picked it up.

At last, since Kurt was standing so close to him, panting, Blaine was able to whisper the ending of the song.

_"If you touch me  
You'll understand what happiness is  
Look, a new day. Has begun"_

"Come on in" Kurt muttered still holding Blaine's hand and then pulled him inside without waiting for an answer.

They both went upstairs, totally aware of what's going to happen now, but still holding their tongues.

***

Kurt sat down on his bed and motioned for Blaine to do the same

"What do you want?" Kurt sighed.

"Kurt. Has anyone ever told you that you have amazing eyes?"

"Yes. You"

"I'm attracted to you, Kurt" there, he said it right away, leaving him helpless.

Kurt had a lot of dreams about Blaine ever since the day he met him and in all of them Blaine told him that he loves him, could this be another dream?

"Why?" Kurt asked, trying to lead Blaine into a trap.

"I feel like I want to keep you close to me and to protect you" he confessed.

"I don't believe you" Kurt said again, even though he wanted believe him.

"You have such amazing qualities, Blaine, and such strong character. You're charismatic you have hundreds of friends" he stressed out the last word as if he's hinting "Why me?"

"Everything is easy for you, Blaine, too easy to be real"

"Kurt I want you to forgive me for every harmful thing I might have said the other day. I didn't want to hurt your feelings. I know I shouldn't have insisted on such a stupid thing. Please forgive me"

He shut the door so he wouldn't wake up the others and shouted "You still think I'm so damn naïve, huh?" Kurt returned to his place and continued

"Why aren't you telling me the truth about what you really want from me. I have a feeling it's not exactly my personality you're attracted too" Kurt was about to break.

"You better leave Blaine. It was too obvious to you that I was in love with you that you decided to exploit it to your own favor" tear ran down his eye.

"Kurt, I can't believe that's what you make of me. I like you and I'm not pushing you into anything against your own will! If that's what I made you feel then I'm begging you to forget about that."

"You just don't get it Blaine. You forgot yourself what you told me on the first day we met? You said you're a virgin..you lied" he concluded.

Silence.

"I had to…lie" he lowered his voice as if he's very ashamed "I wanted you to like me"

"But you're right. I don't deserve you. Kurt. You were so sincere with me from day one and I just…" he picked up his bag and went towards the door.

"Wait!" Kurt sighed "That's just not fair towards you to end it this way. You've helped me with Karofsky, now it's my chance to support your back, but not as your boyfriend or anything like that" Kurt clarified to Blaine but also to himself, he finally understood that Blaine was much more than a good friend, he was the only one to understand him in his lowest moments of life.  
He didn't want to ruin that.

"Come here" Kurt tugged him into a hug "We were best friends, and we can get back to that point, if you can promise me that our friendship will be based on trust" he gave Blaine a serious 'I'm-not-joking' look.

"Well, I'm ready for that. Just tell me what you want to know about me, today I'm not keeping anything from you"


	6. Daring it

"So, are you still 'dating' that boy?"Kurt gave Blaine his pillow so he could lean on it.

_'Okay, so he doesn't know that there were a few boys, that's good. Wait. No. I'm not gonna lie again' _

"Kurt, in the last few months, I've been with more than one man, but I'm not anymore" he corrected him.

"More than one?" he sounded surprised.

"Well, four actually?" he pried his way into Kurt's mind.

"Four?" he glared at Blaine agitated "Eh, not that it concerns me or anything just surprised" he regretted his reaction.

"Yeah, but I broke up with all of them. I'll prove it" Blaine took out his cellphone and showed him the messages he had sent and received in the last few days.

"And you left them because..?" Kurt inquired and placed a hand under his chin.

"Because I want to be with you now. Look," he gave the device to Kurt, so he'd peruse it himself.

"Yeah.." Kurt said unimpressed. He attempted to avoid showing Blaine any sign that he cared about him.

"Kurt, to tell you the truth, I wasn't always like that. I… actually started out high school as a pretty much the opposite. But after I had to leave my school because of bullies and got here to Dalton, something happened..I've opened up to things"

"And you feel totally comfortable with that 'friends with benefits' thing?" Kurt said in a hesitant voice.

"I'm assuming that it's not exactly the way you see it. I'll explain it to you later though 'cause first I want to share something with you that I've been kinda hiding" he clenched his teeth like he was trying to make himself sound softer.

He continued in a sensitive fumbling tone "It's about my first day in Dalton"

Kurt nodded silently.

"Almost nobody knows about it, but I've decided I want you to know. I want you to see me just the way I am, because…um.. I do have a few masks I put on every day, and when I see that you're not putting anything on you, it makes me feel like I-"

"Blaine-?" Kurt tried to say something

"No, Kurt. Make up doesn't' count" he laid a hand on Kurt's knee slowly "you're still the same person with or without it" he smiled with a closed mouth.

That tiny almost unexcited smile and the compliment that followed turned Kurt on and unlocked the cage of his heart. He could feel himself how the feelings are running out free, leaving through the open window into the dark streets, maybe searching their way to the moon. He was breathing, but it felt different. Whatever was blocking the way had melted.

Blaine had noticed the change in Kurt's expression, and his eyes emoted something more keen and impish than before, but he avoided mentioning it.

"Anyway, on my first day I had no idea what I was doing. It felt like everyone was patronizing me 'here's the new guy' and stuff like that. On recess I locked myself up in an empty room on the first floor and worked on my homework" he grinned as he remembered it.

"But when the first day was over, I had decided that I was sick from being alone, I had this urge inside me, to live up to my potential, to be good at making friends."

Kurt longed to lean his head on the bed, but thought it might be impolite. He pulled over the chair that was near his computer desk to sit on. He nodded to imply he was being attentive.

"It's hard to imagine you like that" Kurt said in a weak voice and coughed quietly to clear his throat "it's like, who's Blaine without a bunch of friends around him, asking him questions, dying to hang out with him.."

"Yeah, I know people see me that way, but it's not entirely who I am" he exclaimed, trying to stress his point.

Kurt could hear Finn snoring in the next room. Thankfully their conversation didn't wake him up, yet.

"That day, my first day alone in Dalton I finally realized that I had a problem, and after a short check on the internet, I even knew its name" he said with a sober expression in his calm eyes.

"It's called Social Anxiety," he clarified, and Kurt rolled his chair closer to him, attempting to hear him better.

"In other words, it means 'thinking too much about the way people see you.' It's something I've suffered from ever since I can remember. On that day, I decided that I'd put an end to it" he moistened his mouth.

"I.." he laughed in embarrassment. "I actually made a list of all the things that "I'm afraid to do. Especially things that scared me that time regarding other people" Kurt could look at his eyes and see that Blaine was reflecting on his own past," and there were so many stupid things at that time. "Kurt, I mean, you wouldn't feel uncomfortable eating in front of someone, or telling him 'oh, wait a sec. I'm just going to the toilet' or talking to a clerk in a store 'cause you want to apply for a job..it sounds ridiculous"

"Yeah, I see what you mean" Kurt imagined the secluded Blaine alone. It was the strangest thing ever to come up in his mind.

"These were the easiest things to do on my list, so I chose the most difficult thing from it, you know, to "break the spell"…and that thing was hitting on a man. A straight man" he emphasized.

"No!" Kurt formed a frozen "O" with his lips, so thrilled that he wouldn't move a muscle.

Blaine began thinking to himself how cute his wet reddish lips could possibly get.

"You did it" Kurt stated like it was obvious to him.

"Yup. Scared to death I drove to a straight club, just…wanting so bad to face the truth" he balled his hands into fists. "But things didn't turn out as expected" he blushed.

Kurt still glued to his spot, mesmerized by Blaine's extroverted actions, nodded while his eyes gleamed in anticipation.

"I remember it took me a while to overcome my anxiety. I stood near the entrance and let my eyes move, checking each and every man who was inside, until I saw a group of men, dancing close to three beautiful girls on the podium that was in the middle of the dance floor. I forced myself to approach them, making myself dull my senses and give in to the darkness and the trance music. I remember myself standing in front of someone twice as big as me, with muscles and-"

"Oh my god!" Kurt exclaimed in embarrassment.

"Wait!" he threw a pillow at Kurt "You haven't heard the juicy part yet!" he gestured with his hands. "I started dancing near them, pretending I knew the gang for like forever, and when one of them gazed at me, thinking 'what the hell's he doing?' I couldn't believe myself but I started flirting with him; batting my eyelashes, I asked him 'what's your name', placing a hand on his shoulder and offering to dance with him. Of course all of his friends looked shocked at me, trying to imply that I was being awkward," he sighed. "But that guy already had both his hands on my shoulders, directing me into the corner to sit on a chair. He sat right on me and started making out with me before I could even think 'what's going on here?'"

Kurt remained silent. He was trying to hide the fact that visualizing the kiss made him feel like a cold blade of steel had stabbed his heart.

"You see?" He threw his hands in the air. "Kissing that stranger…maybe just kissing for the first time, was what actually broke the "spell" I'd been in, that bubble I kept living in," he gazed for a second at Kurt, to check that he was still listening and continued on "and..and when all that shattered, I made myself a golden rule in 'relationships' – first do it, and only then think about it."

Kurt couldn't help but smile _'that explains a lot'_ he thought. He tried to analyze his own life – could he apply that rule too?

"Because if I did think about it," Blaine kept his fluent flow of words, "who knew how my high school years would have ended up?" he pouted in a joking manner as he considered his possible alternate life "being alone, no friends, no love, never entering the Warblers, or meeting you" Blaine implied.

"In another words, your motto is 'dare it'" Kurt concluded.

"Totally! The more something scares you, the more important it is that you do it!"

"Wow, just because I'm scared of kissing random men doesn't mean I should do it," Kurt retorted.

"You know what I mean, Kurt. Each one of us has totally different baggage, but somewhere deep inside, we know what the thing is that we're postponing, just because we're scared," Blaine said while standing up, ready to leave.

"Maybe there are few things that fall in that category in my life," Kurt said and hugged Blaine, mentally checking the first item off of his list of things 'to do'.

"I'll walk you to the door. You have your car here with you, right?" he muttered while they took off down the stairs.

"Yeah, don't worry about me. I'm a night owl, I'm not going to bed anytime soon," Blaine simpered.

"Huh, you're going to party between some other cute men?" Kurt tried his best not to sound too worried about that.

"Yeah, you wanna come?" Blaine took a pair of pink sunglasses out of his trousers pocket and put them on, just to get in the mood.

"I'm in my pajamas already, maybe next time."

"Go get changed in under five minutes, I'll be waiting for you in my car," Blaine stepped out of the house.

"But we're doing this just as good friends, right?" he hesitated.

Blaine lowered his sunglasses down to his nose "Do you really believe that this guy would break a promise he has made to you?" he pointed at himself.

"I guess not," Kurt smiled and went up the stairs again.

In the morning, Kurt didn't have to wake up to school because he didn't bother going to sleep. Blaine convinced him to spend the whole night with him pretty easily: "you've never pulled an all nighter?" he asked in the middle of the house party they've just joined "I mean, you're almost eighteen, when did you think about doing it if not now?"

"How often do you pass on sleeping Blaine? You party animal" Kurt answered sarcastically while drinking a Jägermeister shot.

"From time to time, you'll see you like it too" Blaine refilled Kurt's shot and they both drank another one together.

An unfamiliar man's face pulled Blaine's arm into a tight dance. Kurt jumped from his chair to join him and to oversee the developments. To Kurt's delight, Blaine danced close to him only for a few seconds, exaggerating closeness as a joke, and then shook him off, and started to make up his own moves for the music.

"We're not drunk right?" Kurt yelled the question in Blaine's ear.

"So what if we are?" Blaine shouted back and burst into laughter. He danced while placing his hands on Kurt's shoulders and waist, still as part of a dramatic act "Just kidding Kurt!" he screamed back after a few seconds "You can't get drunk from two shots!"

"But we're still waiting until we're fully sober before driving back?" he ask uneasily as if he's expecting Blaine to promise him.

"Yeah! We can wait all the time you want. We basically have all night!"

School is a total different experience when you give up on your daily eight hours rest, but not for Blaine Anderson. The guy had a spring in his step, dashing here, there and everywhere bursting with positive energy.

Kurt, on the other hand couldn't feel his muscles and he had to force himself up from the class to the hallway to eat his homemade lettuce sandwich before lunch break is finished. He sat on one of the benches in the middle of the hall, gazing at Blaine who was in the meantime busy making sure he talked to every single person in that corridor, sharing experiences from the weekend.

As Kurt followed him with his eyes, he saw him turning to Wes and David that were on their way to the rehearsal room. Blaine accosted them with enthusiasm, "I have an awesome song for regionals! It's funny, it's catchy, and it has a great harmony and back vocals already placed. And um, since it's a duet, I thought about singing it with K-"

Wes gave him a weary look "We already have a long list of songs we want to check," Wes said "but we'll consider this song, thanks."

Kurt wished he was close enough to hear what song Blaine suggested, not knowing that it's going to be one of the most memorable and significant songs in his life.

What's on the list for today?" Blaine asked the council members."

"We have a change in our plans, we want to start working today on Misery" Wes browsed his backpack and took out the sheets for him "you know the song already, right? Our adaption is pretty much the same for the lead,"

"No..no problem at all, Maroon 5 could totally rock in regionals." He said still a bit disappointed they didn't want his suggestion.

"You know what? Take the sheets to all the other Warblers to start working on it right now, maybe if we take advantage of the lunch break we'll have this number flowing smoothly already today" David suggested and gave him a handful of musical sheets. Blaine was convivial, he was asked to do one of the things he loved the most: rehearsing.

Kurt leaned back on the couch after he finished eating and closed his eyes thinking of the possibility of catching a short nap, but he couldn't drift off. His senses we're too concentrated on Blaine's lively encounters with Warblers members.

"Here, that's our number for today, oh! And Wes also asked me to briefly show you the choreography for the chorus, you're going to be divided into three groups and-"

_'Why do I find this man so attractive?' _Kurt thought while listening to him _'I think I'm starting to understand...he loves people, and that makes him so…alive_.' Kurt opened his eyes and approached Blaine that was in the middle of a conversation with Nick and Trent.

"Ok, we've reached 'I am in misery'" Blaine started singing and indicated with his hands the choreography he made up "it's leg to the right, leg to the left, hold, cover up your heart, hands across your head and turn". As they tried to do the same moves, his eyes strayed to the right and he noticed Kurt "You can join our practice if you want" he winked and gave Kurt the sheets of the song. Kurt nodded. He went and stood a bit aside from everyone else and copied Blaine's moves like everyone else. Meanwhile, a few other Warblers came from the stairway and joined those already practicing the moves that Blaine made up.

A few minutes later, when recess was over, Blaine finished his teaching with a satisfied expression on his face "Nick, you got everything right so now you're responsible to check that everyone here is ready for this afternoon"

Nick nodded and Blaine gave him a friendly pat on the shoulder as he went down the stairs back to the classroom. On his way down he told Wes: "Choreography checked, we'll just have to work a little bit on the singing modulation that is different from the original version and we're all set" he grinned.

"Great! Then I'll see you this afternoon" Wes replied as he entered his classroom and Blaine continued alone along the corridor.

He passed near a small room, not so far from the school entrance, he moved past it, into the classroom he needed, but when he turned back to gaze at the door for one more second he met Kurt's eyes.

He turned back and entered the class, sat in his regular place, but his thoughts were in a mess_ 'he saw me in that room, he admitted that yesterday.'_ The assumption bounced around in his head every few seconds when he remembered it in the middle of the lesson. He gazed at Kurt whenever he could while writing the lesson in his notebook, but Kurt didn't look back at him.

After the lesson, Blaine approached him "I want to talk to you again, if you don't mind"

"Sure" he shrugged and stood up.

They both took their schoolbags and stepped into the hallway "do you want us to sit here?" he pointed at an empty couch in the far corner. Kurt nodded in agreement and closed his eyes, exhausted.

"We're totally honest now, right?"

"Yes" Kurt said wearily. He opened his eyes and leaned his head forward to give Blaine his full attention.

"Do you want to tell me something?" Blaine inquired seriously while leaning his elbow on the sofa, his body facing Kurt's.

Something vibrated and hummed in Kurt's bag: he took out his phone and read the message.

_You are not going to believe this! I feel like I should sell the rights on my life to __Hollywood__ or something, can I come see you tomorrow? -_Thomas

Blaine tried to read the whole line upside down, but Kurt read it faster than him, and replied a quick _yes_, then he stashed it away in a small pocket in his bag.

"I'm fine Blaine, believe me" he said apathetically without looking at him in the eyes.

"I guess I was mistaken" He apologized and got up _'for caring too much about you. Who's this new man in your life? Why didn't you tell me about him?'_

He got up the stairs with much more concerns than what he had in the morning, leaving Kurt to sit alone in the same spot he was in a few weeks ago, alone.

Kurt glanced at his watch: It was finally 04:00 PM, in the longest day in his life.

The Warblers still haven't finished discussing the outfits they're going to wear for regionals, but he was too tired to care about it. He had to close his eyes just for one second.

"O.K, let's vote, who supports the same outfit for the lead vocal as the backup singers?

He opened his eyes again: everyone raised their hands except for him.

"So the lead will have the regular Warbler shirt and tie" Thad announced.

After a few minutes, where his mind jumped back and forth from being concentrated and daydreaming, David tapped the council's hammer gavel.

"That's it for today, please all of you who still don't remember their parts by heart, work on it for tomorrow's rehearsal" he got up from his seat, and so did the rest of the Warblers that went in the direction of the door. David called out to two of them, "Oh, and you two said you can't reach the lower part in the bridge" he turned to Luck and Matt "let me hear you try the bridge as the Tenors" he tapped his tuning fork on the wooden table and gave them the starting note. They all sang as David hummed the lead for them.

"Kurt" Jeff approached him "We're having a Warbler-party tonight. Can you come?"

"No...I don't think so…I really need to get some-"

"Of course you're coming!" Blaine laid a hand on his shoulder and whispered in his ear "Just sleep at home until the night and you'll be fine"

"You're pushing me to the edge and I don't think-" he said overstressed

"He'll come" Blaine answered for him and explained "I swear you won't regret this, Kurt, the Warblers' parties are the best: a swimming pool, food, dancing, bonding. Don't miss on that for… come on, sleep? **Been there done that**!" He retorted to Kurt's words to him earlier that day. "Sleep until the evening just before going to Jeff's house. Tell me if you need a ride"

"Thanks, I think I'll handle this" he grabbed his bag and started heading towards the door.

"The Warblers who live far, like you, can stay for a sleepover there too, bring a tooth brush if you're more comfortable with that" Blaine gazed to his left, _'David's still busy with the boys_' he thought.

"Sure thanks" Kurt placed his hand on the door, waiting for Blaine to come with him.

"Oh, I'm not going home yet" Blaine explained "I'll be staying for an extra rehearsal on the lead with Wes and David, so I'll see you there?"

"Yes" Kurt turned back to the corridor and left the room.

"Bye" he said brooding.

_'Oh my god, it's official now, Mr. Anderson isn't human, isn't he exhausted? I can see the black circles under his eyes, the laxity of the muscles in his body, but it's like there's something in his head that keeps it all together working_', Kurt thought as he went down the entrance stairs and into the bus stop.

Blaine arrived at only 11:00 PM, being fashionably late, and started by greeting every single person that was near and around the pool. Kurt wondered if he ignored him on purposed and kept following him with his eyes.

Blaine placed his backpack on one of the tanning chairs and started undressing: he put his shirt and pants inside his bag, closed the zipper and threw the bag aside.

"How are you doing Kurt?" Kurt panicked and almost fell into the water, he got into some kind of trance the moment Blaine pulled off his shirt and had his head blank from thoughts until now.

"I'm fine" he said briefly.

"Getting used to the temperature of the water?" he asked since Kurt's legs were on the ledge of the pool.

"Yeah, I'm not really in the mood for swimming."

"Do you want me to give you a push?" he jested.

"No thank you" he said exquisitely and pouted his lips.

"You can always try my way to get used to the water" Blaine ran backwards and leaped in the water, leaving a trail of splashes after him as he sunk in to the pool.

He sprung off from the bottom and started accosting everyone that was inside the water.

Kurt was still sitting on the edge of the pool, almost jumping into the water, out of the safe zone, but didn't.

Instead, he turned his head to look behind him: the club members split into a lot of smaller groups, and Kurt couldn't decide where he would fit in the best.

To his left were Jordan, Luke and Jon eating hotdogs, behind him Jeff, Nick and Matt playing table football and to his right: Steve, Aaron and Brock, chatting exuberantly. He felt like he'd look stupid if he tried to talk to them, when they had absolutely nothing in common. A new association from yesterday linked itself into his thoughts _'The more something scares you, the more it's important that you do it' _he pushed his body straight into the pool: _'time to do_.' The water was freezing cold, but he could handle that _'hell yeah, I'm gonna face all my fears! I'm sick of creating and planning my life through meticulous thoughts that sometimes has nothing to do with reality. I want my eyes to decide from now on. I want to be truly free, to feel my body rushing in fear and anxiousness every second of my life, but just never again be in the zone of safety, that's not what living is about.'_

Blaine was playing water polo right in front of him. He swam fast into the group and asked to join them.

"Sure" Wes muttered "but now we don't have equal numbers on each groups, so.." he lingered in thoughts "let's play something else: a contest of individuals, we'll just rule out anyone who doesn't catch the ball in time, but you must catch it using one hand only"

"Wow, ok" ,Kurt thought, _'just relax and have fun, no spare thoughts.'_

Wes passed the ball to Kurt, Kurt passed to Trent, Blaine snatched the ball from him while it was still in the air "Oh, sorry are we allowed to do that?" he asked.

_'the master of unthinking_', Kurt wanted to be like that, and he decided that he will. '_If Blaine can, then I can too, he thought'_ and started jumping higher than he thought he was able in order to catch the ball more than anyone else in the pool.

He wasn't the best, and he knew it. Most of the men that participated were stronger, but he felt like he gave it one hundred percent effort, leaving mediocrity out of the pool, but something unexpected happened then...

"Do you know where the bathroom is?" Kurt asked Trent as he got out of the pool "go inside the house. I can see Blaine there, just follow him"

Kurt ran to keep up with Blaine who had already closed the door behind him. He saw Blaine knocking on the bathroom door and waiting impatiently but at that second the content expression on his face changed completely to a horrified and worried look. Kurt was scared _'what the hell happened to him?_' and decided not to enter the house yet, he kept watching the vulnerable Blaine from the outside glass door.

Kurt saw Blaine entering the bathroom annoyed; he seemed too distracted to notice that Kurt was looking at him from beyond the door. "What the hell are you doing here? Are you stalking me?" He could hear most of Blaine's yelling, but not the other person whose voice echoed feebly inside the house.

He was too curious to stay there, so he opened the glass door of the porch, and gazed at the two men through the crack between the door and the lintel.

"You can't tell me what to do Blaine, just so you know, I was invited here too" he said trying to irritate him even more.

"You're not even a Warbler" Blaine protested "you know what? Be wherever you want it's not like I care"

"I loved you" Paul mumbled from between his teeth and quickly pulled Blaine towards him into a French kiss, tightening his body as much as he can to Blaine's swimming suit, but Blaine pushed him aside "I'm not getting back with you!" he yelled at him and left.

Kurt quickly hid behind the black sofa in the living room while perplexed Blaine climbed the stairs to the bathroom on the second floor.

Kurt wasn't sure if it's just his imagination, because the living room was quite dark, but something sparkled on Blaine's cheek, it could have been just wet from swimming, could have been a tear.

Later that evening Kurt tried to get Blaine to talk to him about the incident he shouldn't have witnessed at all, but Blaine avoided the conversation, and did extra efforts to be perky than ever.

Kurt was the only one to see the frustration sneaking in to his face right after each smile. No one but him noticed the bitterness in Blaine's eyes as they lay on that man, his ex, who was busy making out with another man whom Kurt didn't know.

Kurt decided to take the initiative and sat with Blaine on the stone fence that encircled Jeff's house "We're being totally honest now, right?" he repeated Blaine's words to him earlier that day.

Blaine signed and nodded in agreement

"Do you want to tell me something?" Kurt asked seriously.

"You're right. Something happened to me, but I wanted to keep you out of this..." he hesitated for a second "stuff you don't want to know about them anyway"

"Well, share it anyway, I saw how you suffered in the last half an hour, don't you want to get it off your chest?"

"Kurt, I'm fine" he let out a smile

"You know it happened to me too" Kurt muttered

"What are you talking about?"

"That someone forced me into a kiss I didn't want to be part of" Kurt said although he wasn't sure how Blaine's going to react to that. He felt like he's throwing a huge boulder into the pool, splashing the troubling truth all over them.

Kurt lowered his head down "I…I was on my way to the bathroom too and I saw everything that's happened"

"That's...just… I" Blaine let out an embarrassed grin "So you were there the whole time?" he leaned a hand on his forehead.

"I know how you must feel now, so...just wanted to tell you…that" Kurt felt awkward

"You've probably guessed yourself who that man is..." Blaine said in a quiet tone.

"Probably" Kurt looked again into Blaine's eyes, searching for something different, a slight change "but maybe we can forget about all this and go get some drinks"

Blaine's smile widened in agreement.

They both got up from the stone. Blaine placed his hand gently on Kurt's bare back, Kurt held himself in order not to flinch.

"Maybe I'll kiss you to make him jealous back" Blaine looked dazed at Kurt "just kidding" Kurt hurried to add before Blaine could have said 'yes, I'd love that'.

"Just ignore him, he thinks he's interesting but he's very pathetic, right?" Kurt referred the kisses that Paul initiated in order to draw attention.

"Yeah, I'm in a new phase in my life, you know" Blaine forced himself to stop looking at Paul.

"I know what you mean" _'You're looking for a serious relationship_' he thought.

As they got back to the lot near the pool, Jeff and Thad had just finished tuning and installing the D.J station and as a result, loud dance-mix music filled the open air.

"Not my favorite type of music, but maybe we should join everyone" Blaine suggested.

Ten people were already there, dancing like there's no tomorrow.

Blaine started dancing near Kurt but gradually found himself in the middle of the crowd, moving so fast that he caught everyone's attention.

_'I wonder if there's something he's not good at' _He thought while Blaine was showing off some R&B complicated moves.

Kurt joined in to the circle that formed around Blaine, dancing hysterically fast, releasing the energy through his feet and hands. The party was at its peak: almost everyone was able to forget about themselves and reach the point they're just throwing their hands everywhere, dancing in all directions.

Blaine was passing from man to man during his dance moves: making a move, letting the other man react and then moving on. Kurt was trying to do the same: dancing with as much men as he could until the song was over, getting closer to them, syncing with their own movements for one second and then moving on.

It all worked fine until he reached Blaine: he tried to sync his movement with Blaine's rapid dancing, but he couldn't, his body was too fast. Before they knew it, everyone stopped dancing and a calmer song was played.

"I love the way you dance" Blaine said honestly "It could totally boost up our performance in regionals if we plan the chorography together" he said impressed.

Kurt thought to himself _'Oh Blaine, if you only knew I was half copying your moves. Like everyone else here. You just gave a compliment to yourself.'_

"What are you smiling at?" Blaine asked but Kurt only shrugged in response.

They kept dancing on and on until Kurt couldn't feel any muscle of his body anymore, he glanced at his watch – it was almost 02:00 AM.

He went to search his bag that was buried under a pile of other Warbler's belongings.

"Kurt are you leaving?" Blaine said from behind his back, "It's a long ride home, you can stay here for the night and drive home fresh in the morning"

"No, not this time. I have an hour and a half of driving back home, so I should get going" he found his bag and was about to say goodbye to everybody

"Well, it was pretty awesome tonight, don't you think?" Blaine concluded

"Yeah, most of it"

"Right" Blaine smiled to him and hugged him. Kurt tried to hold on to this moment, Blaine's wet swimsuit touching him, cooling him to the perfect point of serenity he needed to get through the terribly long way home.


	7. Breaking the Promise

Kurt managed to get some sleep that night, but not enough to wake up when the alarm clock rang. He woke up to Pavarotti's singing, after 20 minutes of over sleeping.

He wiped his eyes and quickly started taking off his clothes.

"Oh, Pavarotti, what would I do without you?" he said still half asleep while dressing up "I'll just finish dressing up and then I'll feed you" he said while pulling up his pants. Pavarotti shrieked in agreement.

Kurt ran to his desk and recklessly threw all the textbooks that were on it into his bag and then hurried to apply some moisturizing cream on his face. Like every morning, he hummed a song for Pavarotti and then waited for him to answer, but instead of an answer, Kurt heard a small rustle of metal.

Kurt turned to his right. 'Pavarotti?' No answer. He hysterically opened the cage and tried to touch him softly and see if he moves. Oh no! he gasped.

_How did that happen?_ he thought while climbing down the stairs and running to grab anything from the kitchen.

"Hi dad, can I please take the car today? I'm gonna be late for school"

"Sure, don't sweat it," Burt answered "how was the party last night?"

"I'll tell you all about it later, I don't want to be late" he grabbed two slices of bread from the countertop and ran outside the house.

"Ok, have fun at school" he yelled as Kurt closed the door and tapped on the remote control to open his car before he jumped inside the black Jeep.

Kurt felt awful on his way to school, Pavarotti's death made him feel ten times more vulnerable than normal. For the first fifteen minutes of driving he was able to keep himself from crying, but as the realization dawned on him, he decided to let himself unload his sorrow.

He cried until his eyes were red, he wasn't able to breathe from his nose and he had a serious headache. He pulled his car aside after he was out of the highway. He didn't care anymore that he was late for the Warblers' morning rehearsal.

He had settled down enough that he'd be able to concentrate on driving. Kurt returned to the road, this time calmer, with only little sobs from time to time. He knew he wouldn't be able to hide his sorrow from everyone else, so there was no point in trying.

Although Blaine was one of the most popular men in Dalton, there was one thing that still scared him – total rejection from someone he truly cared about.

It was already afternoon, and he was on his way home after the Warbler's rehearsal.

"What's that?" Blaine entered the room hesitantly to pick up his stuff.

"Oh! I'm just decorating Pavarotti's casket" Kurt said concentrated, barely moving his eyes from the case.

"Well, finish up. I've got a great song for us and we should practice" He said with all the enthusiasm he could muster, he loved the fact that he could turn his nervousness to positive excitement.

"Oh! Do tell!" Kurt was co-operating just as he wanted him to.

"Candles by Hey Monday" Blaine said, trying to pretend that he actually cares about the song.

"I'm impressed! You're usually so Top 40," Kurt started imagining both of them dueting on that large stage in front of the hundreds of viewers, thinking how amazing it could be, but something even bigger crawled into his mind at that time.

"Well, I wanted something a little more emotional"

_I'm getting close to it._Blaine thought_. It's going to happen as soon as my mouth will start moving faster than my mind._

"Why did you pick me to sing that song with?" Both men's heart's start raging and pulsing. Kurt knew that he didn't ask the question innocently but now Blaine's sitting too close to him to give up.

_Now's the time._Blaine sighed and closed his eyes, trying to turn off the doubts that lingered in him.

"Kurt, there is a moment when you say to yourself, oh there you are, I've been looking for you forever"

_He's realizing, he's realizing_. Blaine's heartbeat said with every stroke. He took Kurt's hand and placed it under his.

"Watching you do blackbird this week, that was a moment for me, about you"

_He's letting out a little smile! He wants it too! I hope I'm right this time._Blaine thought

"You move me Kurt, singing this duet would just be an excuse to spend more time with you"

_Blaine, I've never seen you so romantic before, you're talking about me like I'm the only person that matters in the world. You're on the verge of crying just because of what I mean to you. I want this, yes. I knew all the time that I was meant for you, _Kurt thought_._

_I'm panting so heavily I'm almost suffocating, but that's 'it'_. Blaine approached Kurt's lips as if they were his air supply.

_So this is how it must feel to be tenderly kissed, my life is worth living just to remain here and absorb you with all my senses_. Kurt thought while his lips were claiming Blaine's, helping him to shed all his pressure.

Air.

"We…we should practice" Kurt thought that Blaine blushed like a little boy who got caught in act and he wanted to fix that impression.

"I thought we were" he still gasped but was ready for more.

Again, the feeling that all of his senses are merging into one little spot containing the entire world in it and that everything else is so small that it doesn't really matter overwhelms him.

The sensation that nothing in the world can make him feel this way except for Blaine.

"So...um, do you want to work on the song?" Blaine suggested again.

_I want this to never end_. Kurt thought and then said "Sure, let's think about how were splitting the song..."

"Oh, sure..umm.. split it how you like, but I want you to do the opening sentence"

"Why?" he asked curious

"Because you can actually sing it in the original key" he said in a tone of 'isn't it obvious?'

"I'm not going to sing it in the original key! It will be ridiculous; I'd sound like a girl"

"You're right" _I wasn't really paying attention to what I'm saying, I was only thinking about how my mouth is warm from your kissing._

"Yes. And YOU won't be able to sing it at all" he jeered "I suggest lowering it at least two or two and half tones down. Want to start?"

"Sure, just a sec. I want to check that it's real" he said and kissed Kurt again.

Neither one of them wanted to let go, because it was exactly what Blaine longed for and it was precisely what Burt described to his son a few weeks ago; it meant something, something so strong that if it could last for a week, it would be enough for a lifetime of happiness.

"I'm still here" Blaine whispered more to himself than to Kurt and petted Kurt's cheek as he let go of his mouth "let's finish singing and then we'll make out as much as you want" he explained slowly and romantically.

Kurt held Blaine's palm between his hands "Touching you makes me feel so warm inside."

"Just wait and see, romance boy, it only gets better," he whispered in his ear, making Kurt shiver in excitement.

The doorbell rang.

"Kurt! Did you invite someone over?" Burt yelled from the living room

"Yes dad! I'll be down in a minute!" Kurt called back. He brushed his hair one last time and ran to the stairs.

"Who did you invite home in such a late hour, Kurt?" Burt said distrustfully.

"Just a friend dad. Don't be so harsh on me!"

"That Blaine again?" Burt guessed and Kurt's first thought was _'When should I tell him about Blaine? I need to prepare him for this'_

Kurt opened the door "Hi Thomas come in! Meet my dad" He closed the door and followed Thomas into the living room "Dad this is Thomas, he's our neighbour"

Burt gave him the look of 'are you together?' and Kurt quickly shook his head embarrassed and took him upstairs. On his way up Kurt thought that Thomas looked different; sulky and stressed. Like he didn't catch enough rest.

"Well, um, this is my room," Kurt opened the door to show him "but it's really boring here, want to go upstairs? We can sit on the roof… Yeah, I know it sounds dangerous. But it's not really" he joked.

"That's ok, I'm fine with that"

They both climbed up to the attic and took the ladder leading to the roof.

Kurt sat on the top of the trap door they climbed through, and motioned Thomas to do the same.

"Come on! I can't hold the pressure anymore. What happened?"

"She called me" he rubbed a hand on his beard bristles and continued "she told me that she wants to meet me and… talk. I lingered a bit on the line, unsure what should I say. I mean, the last time we talked before that she hysterically yelled that she hates me and that I've caused her to lose trust in people"

Kurt nodded as he continued "I asked her if she still believes that I've cheated on her and she thought for a bit and started spilling everything." While Thomas talked, Kurt imagined the whole scenario:

"Thomas" Tracy sighed into the phone. She was alone at her parents' house with all her luggage still in crates and suitcases "Martha was my best friend since we were like, four. I've never doubted anything she has ever said to me and I was sure she was right about us too" she said in an apologizing tone, trying to appease Thomas "We were trying to move on with our relationship too quickly. Of course I wanted that too, I was in favor of living together, but I did regret later paying the price." She opened one crate that contained books and pulled it to her old room to place it back on her bookshelf.

"What do you mean? Regretted what?" Thomas made a special effort to keep calm and gentle because he could hear in her tone that she wanted to burst in tears.

"Ever since we were in high school we've always planned to go to college together and live in the same dorms, you know?" She noticed the dust that piled up everywhere in her room and started cleaning it off with her bare fingers before placing the books "I knew that if you're planning to move to New York and study there for seven years, I'd probably have to...break the bond I have with her"

"So it's my fault" Thomas turned off the T.V in his living room and leaned back on the long couch "I was taking our relationship too seriously and it was a mistake...to move like that...when my words regarding New York were the last thing you wanted to hear...but why didn't you say anything?" It was early in the morning and Thomas had to get dressed for work, but he couldn't do anything else as long as that conversation is still on.

"Look, I wish things were that simple, let's just meet and talk about everything? I'm pretty sure you're mad at me for everything and you have the right to do so, but please let's just see each other one more time before I'm making my decision if I'm staying in Ohio or not" she returned to the kitchen and prepared herself a bowl of cereal and milk. "It's O.K by me if you think that everything's my fault, but...I want to explain everything to you before you tell me that you never want to see me again"

Thomas was still very confused, and he was far from being that peremptory to 'burn the bridges' between them, even though, he thought to himself, _she had the nerve to do it to me._

"Fine" he was too exhausted to continue discussing that and was also about to be late for work. He and Tracy appointed to meet that afternoon in Hoover park, just near her parents apartment.

"And what happened afterwards?" Kurt asked, still immersed in the envisioning of the ex-couple.

"I had a terrible day at work, I couldn't concentrate at all and made stupid mistakes. Got the boss yelling at me after just one hour" Kurt saw he said that with relief, like he's all over that, and was pleased to see that he had grown stronger.

Thomas continued while they were still in the exact same position, only Kurt was looking down at the trapdoor and Thomas was looking at the stars "We walked around the lake and talked, and she told me that she hates New York, and she wants to go to college somewhere closer to home. It's totally impossible for me to go to medical school elsewhere"

Kurt started looking at the stars too "I think she couldn't find the right time to tell you. And she feared your reaction to that...might look like she doesn't support you. Sometimes happiness collides with what you want, and there's nothing to do about it but compromise"

"Why can't she learn to be a teacher in New York?" He mumbled to himself.

"Because she didn't want to break the bond with Martha?" Kurt suggested.

"I'm not sure it has something to do with Martha, they are not talking with each other anymore, you know?"

"Martha had a...secret reason for wanting to live together with Tracy. After 17 years… she developed an interest towards her"

"Oh! I see! She wanted her for herself!" Kurt finally felt like the puzzle was complete.

"She's loved her since high school, and she still does" he said with compassion, feeling sorry for her more than worried.

"It wasn't exactly the friendly thing to do, to lie about me in order to convince Tracy that she's an option too, but she 'had to know', had to hear from her that it could never happen."

"So how did she react?" he asked in a bubbly tone.

"In the beginning Tracy didn't want to tell me about it, but when she explained all that to me I knew that **something** must have happened"

"They hooked up right after she broke up with you?"

"N-No! Not right after.. I mean, they went to the pool together every morning, had lunch every day and went to sleep in the same room, I'm guessing that one night she found herself being touched by her 'friend' that wants to be everything but friends!"

"You don't sound too frustrated about it" Kurt smiled.

"I don't know what to think, but it could have been worse. At least now Martha won't ask herself every morning 'what if?' what if Tracy IS like me?"

"So Tracy left her?"

"Well, yeah. She finally understood that she can't fully trust Martha or believe to everything she says. She packed up all her stuff and called me"

"So..." Kurt sustained the last vowel. "Are you getting back together?" he said with excitement.

"I liked the old Tracy" he said while looking down to his shoes "the one that didn't yell at me like I'm a criminal, so I don't know yet...and now we want different things so.."

"You really should decide about it together, I mean, if you're still thinking of getting back together. I thought you were pretty serious." Kurt raised his eyebrows to stress his point. "Maybe you can make a list of all your plans and goals and see on what you can compromise" he looked into his eyes, trying to grasp his reaction.

"You mean that if she doesn't move to New York with me then it's… over?" he hesitated over the word 'over', like saying it might make it come true.

"I suppose. Long distance relationships just lead to cheating so save yourself the bother" he smiled.

"Maybe we need more time alone," he thought about it "what about you and Blaine?"

"We kissed!" Kurt said exuberantly, his eyes gleaming with joy.

"What? When? How come you're not telling me something huge like that?" he resented.

"Because it was _today_! He just came up with a combination of the most romantic words that made him absolutely irresistible" Kurt licked his lips.

"I'm so happy for you!" he said while still being confused.

"If you still love Tracy, be romantic and gentle with her. Don't be too harsh with her 'cause girls are very sensitive about cheating and all that. Try to understand her!" he snickered, changing completely the gloomy mood of their conversation.

"Thanks for the tip, I want to see things from her point of view, but I really can't. We'll need to have this talk tomorrow and decide if we're going on our separate ways..."

"You should!"

Kurt changed the subjects: "Want to see pictures of me and Blaine?" he opened his cellphone and started browsing it. He blushed and apologized as he had shown him something he didn't mean to "We did a video of our kiss". "Oh, here. That's Blaine" he let him hold the phone and examine him "looks like a great guy"

"He is" Kurt said with the serenity saved only for those who were lit up by their true soul mates. And yet, he knew that perfect pieces of life like this one don't last forever. Kurt was definitely standing on guard, all the time, to destroy even the smallest thing that would try to separate him from Blaine's warmth. He wanted to believe in love for eternity, even though he never knew of such a thing outside fairytales.

It was obvious for both of them that their first actual date is going to be at The Lima Bean. Blaine ordered an apple cider and Kurt chose a cup of tea. They sat down one in front of the other, holding hands over the table and waiting for their drinks to cool a bit. Kurt felt the freedom beating inside him and unexpected warmth filling his lungs. _'that's how it feels when everything…'_ he started thinking to himself when Blaine broke their silent smiles with the exact same thought:

"Finally something feels right here" He exclaimed and Kurt nodded in agreement.

"Maybe we just had to wait for the right moment for it to happen for us?"

"Probably," Blaine conceded "but I've been telling you all along that _you're perfect to me_" he played with his teaspoon with the little slices of apple and ate them one at a time.

"And I'm still waiting for you to tell me about all your other adventures..." Kurt leaned forwards curiously.

"Why is it so important for you to know?" Blaine retorted back.

"I want to know everything about you, to understand you better"

"Fair enough, but don't you think I should be hearing some of YOUR silly life stories too?" Blaine raised an eyebrow. "Doesn't have to be about other men! Just...something about _you_,"

"Well, there was this one time that I bought a special edition Marc Jacobs coat for 2,000 bucks using my dad's credit card and-" Kurt tried to make it sound like a naughty act.

"That's…a different type of crazy" Blaine interrupted "that doesn't count. Don't you have anything…serious?" he tried to push Kurt out of the comfort zone.

Kurt leaned his elbows of the table "Come closer!" he said in a mysterious tone "You know I've actually had a pretty… unadventurous life … but I can tell you about one time in my life where I dared to do something insane… I mean... it can't really compare to what you've probably done-"

"Ok, tell me already!" Blaine was confused and excited and finished his cider in two sips.

Kurt tried to talk, but the words refused to come out. He decided to move even closer to Blaine, taking the chair with him "Just don't tell anyone about this... I mean… NO ONE knows about this"

"I won't!" Blaine indicated that he is willing to keep his secret and approached with his ear to Kurt's mouth.

"Not even my dad" Kurt muttered and whispered in his ear "It's one of the most personal things I can possibly tell you so...please.." he lowered his voice and spoke slowly "I have a tattoo that no one knows about"

_'What?'_ Blaine didn't expect _that 'How could that be? I saw him in his swimsuit and didn't notice anything-'_"Can...I see it?" Blaine asked eagerly, trying to sound calm.

"I promise to show it when we'll be in a more appropriate place" he bestowed Blaine with a tiny smirk that turned him on.

"What kind...?" Blaine kept playing restlessly with his teaspoon. "Is it a picture?"

Kurt shook his head and pulled his own beverage from the far end of the table.

"So?" Blaine kept insisting on more information.

"It's a word" He wasn't sure about telling at first, but now Kurt enjoyed taunting his boyfriend like that, placing his hands on different body parts and letting Blaine's imagination go crazy.

(Page Break)

It took them a few days to get used to being together, to call each other nicknames, and at some point regionals seemed like a dim meaningless memory that's so small next to their first kiss.

"Do you know how to make Ravioli?" Kurt asked as he let Blaine into his house and closed the door.

"No idea" he said frankly and hanged his blazer on the coat rack.

"Great then, I'll teach you" he grinned and took out from the fridge four eggs "We'll start with the dough"

"I'll be back in a minute," Blaine walked towards the corridor "just have to go to the bathroom"

"The door to the right" Kurt pointed it for him.

Kurt took out the flour from the cabinet, oil and salt from the shelf and a measuring cup. He poured everything to a bowl and started mixing it. After a few minutes he called him: "Blaine! You're missing out all the fun!"

"I'm coming!" his voice echoed in the small room.

_'I can't believe that I miss him when he's only in the next room, what's wrong with me?'_he thought while putting the egg shells in the trash.

Blaine opened the bathroom door and joined him. Blaine seemed impressed as he gazed at Kurt preparing the ingredients.

"When I'm content, I usually cook to express how I feel" he explained.

"Wow! That means we're in for something delicious, did I make you that content?" he teased him.

"Might be," he shrugged and stirred the bowl for the last time "now let's make the filling" he put the unprepared dough in the fridge.

"Are you ok with Spinach and Ricotta? What do you like inside?" Kurt inquired.

Blaine had no idea. "I have to admit I've never tried it before, but yeah, sure! Let's go for it!" he kept staring curiously at Kurt's cooking.

"Go take out the cheese from the fridge, I'll bring the nutmegs"

"Sure" Blaine picked up ricotta and mozzarella, and cut a piece from each to place in the plate while Kurt climbed up to reach the highest shelf with the nuts.

After the filling was ready, they had to wait another fifty minutes for the dough to be ready.

Both of them washed their hands and then Kurt invited his boyfriend to sit with him in the living room.

"So...do you like cooking...in general?" he asked just to break the awkward silence when they sat on the couch with their knees touching.

"Yup, especially when you're the chef" Blaine petted his hair softly.

Kurt leaned on Blaine's shoulder "Do you think it's a good thing that every time you're coming closer to me, I feel like I'm about to have a heart attack?" he had to be honest with him or Blaine would have noticed it himself.

"I don't know, sometimes your heart beats so loud, I can hear it better than my own" Blaine gently touched Kurt's nose with his, trying to reach his mouth from there, and Kurt gave in. He moved slowly on Blaine's lips, taking time to feel how soft and perfect it was. For a moment there, they both felt more than just connected, they were two lips converted into one human being.

Kurt detached himself and moved his head to lie on Blaine's knees and then looked up "What do you want to do now?"

"Be with you" he leaned forward and looked in his eyes.

"Well, it's not such a bad idea to just stay here like this" he turned on his side, facing Blaine's belly. Blaine took advantage of this position and gently touched Kurt's hair and then he started caressing it slowly.

A few minutes later something in the mood changed. If Kurt could choose never to bring this subject up, he would have done it, but he didn't have any choice. "Can I tell you something? But only If you promise you won't be angry at me" Kurt wasn't sure about bringing that up at all right now, it could spoil their romantic dinner.

"What is it?" Blaine sounded worried.

"I'm officially moving back to McKinley next term."

"What?" Blaine's expression was frozen, he knew Kurt was thinking about it, but he never thought that it's really going to happen.

_'Why didn't he consult with me first? Or at least let me know that he wants to go back?'_

Kurt tried to explain "Karofsky promised to leave me alone as long as I'll keep his secret, something weird with Santana blackmailing him…" Kurt looked at Blaine's eye, right above his and added "You don't sound too keen about it, and I understand why..." he lowered back his head as if he's apologizing for choosing this.

"I...I'm just surprised. That's all… that's great news" He tried to fake it.

"You don't want me to leave, do you?" he leaned his head on Blaine's belly and heard how heavy his breath had become, it was like he's struggling inside himself and with his feelings.

"I feel like crying" Blaine's tone has changed. "I was counting on you to lead the upcoming projects of the Warblers. Next year, Wes, Thad and David won't be there to lead our club and I hoped it would be you and me, council members..." Blaine shifted his position on the couch, moving Kurt to sit next to him.

"Sorry for destroying that dream of yours... I just… I feel so terrible now. It probably looks like I'm moving from the loser's team to the winner's"

They both sank in silence again. Blaine tried to arrange his thoughts. He wanted to support his boyfriend's decision, but was still thinking of how to convince him to stay at Dalton.

He had no choice but to encourage him even if he hated the idea of him leaving "You're not doing it because you want to win... You miss your old friends, I just... what's going to happen with us?"

Kurt sighed. "I… I know I'm disappointing you and now I've totally ruined the romantic mood" He took Blaine's two hands and tried to retrieve the ambience from before.

"A little bit" Blaine shrugged

"I mean, it's not like we're never going to see each other again" he tried to cheer them both up although he was still feeling worse every second.

"We'll see each other, but not every day" Blaine said in a whisper.

"That's true," he sighed "and I haven't spent a day without you for a long time" he moved back up to place his head on Blaine's shoulder. Blaine tilted his head as well "it's going to be tough"

Blaine got up and stretched himself "I'm not sure if I'm mad at you or just disappointed, but I just…" he turned around in the room, trying to find himself. "I kind of can't find the words, maybe I'll just…" he put on his hipster glasses, took his blazer back from the coat rack "just say it in another way" he prepared his voice from afar and started singing for him, still standing confused near the door.

_"What is this feeling, so sudden and new?"_ he had to let his anger out somehow_"I felt the moment I laid eyes on you."_He pointed at Kurt_. "My pulse is rushing, my head is reeling, my face is flushing, what is THIS feeling"_He slowed down, giving Kurt time to join in.

"_Fervid as a flame, does it have a name?_ _Yes! Yes!_" they combined their voices together, while Kurt taking the higher part in the duet.

"_Loathing! Unadulterated loathing! For your face, your voice, your clothing_" Blaine let the fact that he's going to be far from Kurt most of the week nourish the harsh words, while he was still keeping a small grin on his face, to show Kurt that there's nothing strong enough to change how he really feels for him.

"_Let's just say - I loathe it all!_" Blaine imagined Kurt back in McKinley and him back in Dalton. He'll have friends there, but it would never be the same.

"_Every little trait, however small makes my very flesh begin to crawl with simple utter loathing"_Kurt joined in the song naturally. There were a few frustrating things he wanted to sing about. Kurt was sure relieved he's leaving Dalton. Aside from Blaine, he didn't have any friends there and he felt like the only reason people interact with him is because Blaine's there too.

_"There's a strange exhilaration in such total detestation It's so pure, so strong!_"

_'I love how his eyes gleam and glitter when he's passionate about something'_Blaine thought.

At the same time Kurt thought about Blaine's singing lips, uttering one word after the other._'I want to take a picture of his smile and hang over my bed…. who am I kidding? I want to hang it in my mind, to pull out whenever I need it - just like opening a drawer.'_

"_Though I do admit it came on fast still I do believe that it can last_

_And I will be loathing, loathing you my whole life long!_" Kurt thought to himself that only a couple who's so in love could have acted out such passionate hatred in the song. Apparently most of the anger comes from the fact that Blaine cares for him that much. He could feel Blaine's energy reaching inside into him, detaching him from a whole human being, to pieces of incompleteness that only he can perfect.

They're so close now. Kurt's waist touching Blaine's, their shoulders sensing the other man's warmth. The last line of the song was not just a strong line, it's a statement, and when Blaine belted 'my whole life long' he really felt it. He wanted Kurt close to him like that, until the very last day of his life.

Blaine lay back on the couch and before he knew it Kurt was lying right on him, "my whole life long" he repeated the line and tugged him into a hug, Blaine responded with a soft kiss, but this time Kurt was much more than warm, he felt like Blaine's burning all his senses with his passion.

He realized that even though the song softened him a bit, Blaine was still very vulnerable. Kurt started thinking to himself that he made a stupid choice. Who cares about other people in Dalton? And it wasn't that bad to see Rachel and Mercedes after school, big deal, they're not that important as Blaine. But he chose to leave Blaine there and now he has to stand up for what he has decided.

When Kurt returned to McKinley he remembered why he wanted to leave so bad. The situation with Karofsky was far from being over


	8. The Sleepover

It was late in the evening and Kurt fell asleep while cuddling with Blaine who was watching Desperate Housewives on the television. Neither of them heard when Burt entered the apartment nor were they aware of the surprised expression on his face.

Burt stood at the entrance, still holding the key inside the door and examining his living room: Blaine, the boy he had gotten to know under strange circumstances was sitting there and Kurt's head was lying with his eyes closed resting on Blaine's groin. _And he thought Kurt told him this stuff…_

That Blaine boy is turning around now and looking at him, considering if he should get up and risk waking Kurt. He slowly places a pillow under Kurt's head as he moves towards the Burt and offers him a hand shake even though they've met before.

Burt dropped the keys on the rack and shook his hand politely.

"Burt Hummel. We've met before" his handshake was very fierce and strong, Blaine compelled himself to stretch his muscles too and project back self-confidence.

"Blaine Anderson," he let out a small smile and turned to look at the sleeping boy "I'll go wake him up."

"No, Blaine. That's fine. Leave him be," Burt lead him to the kitchen and beckoned Blaine to sit in front of him, just like he used to do with his own son.

Blaine couldn't decide what to tell Burt, so he said the obvious "I'm dating your son for…two weeks. I hope I'll gain your trust." he grinned in discomfort.

"Blaine," Burt spoke while taking off his hat and placing it on the table "I trust my son and the choices that he makes. That's all." Blaine wondered why that didn't make him feel any calmer.

"Well, it-it's late now." Blaine gets up before Burt can get to more personal questions "Maybe some other day we can have a nice dinner where I could introduce myself to the whole Hummel-Hudson family, and then get to know you too."

"Yes, yes. We should do that," he sighed.

Blaine nodded and got up to open the fridge "Um...Kurt and I…I mean, mostly Kurt made Ravioli" he took the box out "do you want some?"

"You cook Blaine?" Burt turned the question around.

"N-not really. Only in case of emergency. You know, when there's no food at all. Was that my audition as a boyfriend?"

"Not at all, just like you said – trying to get to know you better. Your hobbies, skills..."

He opened the box and seemed quite impressed "I hope there'll be some left tomorrow, it looks so good" Burt was about to continue Kurt and Blaine's cooking.

Blaine has started making his way to the door, when Burt says "I can already tell you that you're always welcome here anytime as part of the family. Are you sure you don't want to stay for dinner?"

"Thanks for inviting me but I have to get home soon."

He didn't know if he should shake Burt's hand or maybe hug him, so he stayed back "Goodbye and have a great week" he said just before he left, leaving Burt to stare at his sleeping son. He was thinking how much he has changed, opened up to new things and confronted his fears. Kurt has grown so much in the past year and that made Burt a proud dad.

He was standing at the top of the staircase gazing at Kurt: he was wearing white and smiling like an angel at the surprise that had awaited him upon his return to McKinley.

_"I walked across an empty land, I knew the pathway like the back of my hand"_

Kurt was stunned. He didn't expect Blaine to be there, he wanted to take him aside. He wanted to tell him that he regrets his choice, but the familiar tune filled an empty place inside him.

_"I felt the earth, beneath my feet. Sat by the river and it made me complete"_

Blaine was half closing his eyes, trying to focus on remembering bits and pieces of his memories of him and Kurt together. He wanted Kurt to feel a little sorrowful for leaving and at the same time he tried to make Kurt proud of him for driving all this way right after school.

Blaine was in the usual trance-like state he experienced while singing. He did have some thoughts at that special moment, when he said goodbye to Kurt, but they were all very blunt and hazy.

_"Oh simple thing, where have you gone? I'm getting old and I need something to rely on"_

He wanted to rely on Kurt as a part of his own being, his self because he becomes such a different person near him.

_"So tell me when you're gonna let me in"_

Soon they'll have the dinner, will he be a part of Kurt's family? An inseparable component in his life?

_"I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin…"_

'We need to take time to build us up' Blaine thought. 'I don't want it all to fade away_…'_

_"If you have a minute why don't we go? Talk about it somewhere only we know. This could be the end of everything. So why don't we go? So why don't we go"_

On that moment when he played the piano and sang he realized how lucky he is right now. Even though Kurt is leaving, he has a person he could stick with for his whole life.

They hugged and Blaine could hear how his boyfriend panted heavily "I'm never saying goodbye to you," he whispered in his ear.

Blaine grinned shyly and went up the stairs to wait for Kurt who got welcoming hugs from his friends in McKinley.

Kurt couldn't let leave Blaine without a goodbye kiss, he ran up the stairs to thank him properly, but Blaine was talking with Wes.

Blaine turned to him and they went aside.

"You know," Kurt said "today we have eight hours rehearsals for nationals, so I might be a little late for our dinner with my parents..."

"When do you assume you'll be back?" he asked while restlessly playing with his tie.

"Probably around seven, I'll call you when we're finished," he looked at his watch "I have to get back" he murmured and hugged Blaine again in gratitude "But you were amazing, all of you. I can't believe all the Warblers are here…and I'm pretty sure you'll be the winners next year. The judges at Regionals didn't know what they're saying!" he grinned and stared at the Warblers that had come all the way from Westerville to say goodbye to him.

There's even one moment that's better than their usual goodbye kiss, and it's the second before it. The split second of being close enough that Kurt can examine Blaine's tiny bristles above his lips, little hairs he's the only one who'll ever see, his tiny fragile eyelashes, and the little black outlines surrounding his lips and cheeks. In that split second Kurt always asks himself 'is this really happening to me?' and then Blaine closes his lips on him with a determined 'yes'.

They are breathing each other in again and if everyone's looking at them, then at least they could be sure they're seeing true love. _They might even be a little jealous_, Kurt thought, _that Blaine Anderson can't be theirs._

"Already missing you," Blaine whispered in his ear "brace yourself. Weekend's coming up." He winked.

"So Blaine, I'll see you tonight too for one hour or two?"

"Yes, and you could join later our Warbler hangout if you want" Blaine said while leaving to the parking lot. He ran back into the minivan that waited for him there. The Warblers members were already waiting outside, talking excitedly.

"Was it worth it, coming to Mckinley?" Blaine asked when they all entered the vehicle.

"It's not so far from Westerville as you'd think," Wes commented "it was pretty short visit though."

"Yup, that was our best number this year. Our lost dignity was restored!" Trent said.

"Blaine, we didn't do this whole trip to Lima over nothing right? I'm expecting a Warblers hangout!" Matt exclaimed while taking off his Blazer and hanging it aside. "And it's going to be hard to compete with Jeff's pool party".

"I actually wanted to do this as a surprise, but never mind." Blaine mumbled as he stood in the front of the car and announced: "We are going to perform at three different places in Lima, get people hyped about us, so when our album comes out everyone will know who these Warblers are"

A loud discourse began, stating that they were all surprised.

"Wow!"

"Hell, that's just gonna be awesome."

"I can't believe it!"

"Blaine you're the best!" They all jumped on him at the same time.

"Um, well, you should thank our three awesome council members that took care of all the technical stuff. All I did was nag some teen clubs to put us on the list of bands" he chuckled.

Kurt arrived to the Glee club rehearsals room and found Rachel waiting alone. She was sitting on the pianist chair and doing vocal warm up.

"Kurt, the Warblers were amazing. That song was so romantic! You know, we are so lucky we beat them at regionals. They were very tough opponents" She was serious, but it made Kurt laugh.

"You're not just saying that because me and Blaine sang the solos there?" he asked.

"No!" she talked with her hands "They are just so arranged, and they have such a busy rehearsals schedule, which makes me wonder – where is everybody? Why can't New Direction start rehearsals on time?" she felt like she was the only one who cared.

"I think nobody is taking us seriously, not even the members of our own club." he sighed in agreement and sat next to her.

"Oh, there's Mercedes!" Rachel said

"Where's the rest?" She asked Mercedes who was talking in her cellphone and motioning her to wait.

A minute later the majority glee club had already arrived. Everyone but Mr. Schue and Noah Puckerman were there.

Everyone was talking excitedly about the upcoming rehearsal that Mr. Schue had promised would be something special and long.

"Hiya, guys" Will Schuester rushed into the class and placed his briefcase on the piano. "Everyone's here? Great. I mean except for Puck, he told me he'll be late because of extra classes in literature… ok!" he yelled to get their attention "you have any idea why I brought you here in your free time?" he didn't give them time to answer "Yes, Nationals are coming up!" He wrote on the board the word "New York".

"We don't need an eight hour rehearsal for that" Kurt said. "Let's just do the Lady Gaga number, I'm sure everyone will agree with me."

He sat backwards on the chair and looked at them "Kurt, that's not enough. We need at least two major songs that will be totally mind-blowing, bewildering...we need to bring to that stage something new"

"Are you saying what we've performed so far is not good enough?" Santana protested from the back row.

"No I just want us to choose the perfect songs, they must be original songs, not covers and we must choose them together" he clapped his hands "now, everyone, get up and start walking around the room"

They all left their seats still a little confused and made their way to the other side of the room. Kurt was delighted '_I missed it a lot. Schue's crazy ideas, Santana's bitching, Rachel being bossy and Finn who can't even walk straight…' _He thought as Finn bumped intoMike Chang_._

"I knew coming here was going to be a waste of time" Santana moaned, but nobody paid attention to her, she only made Rachel and Kurt, who were now walking side by side, laugh.

"Ok! No talking! Everyone just walk or glide wherever you want, but don't stop" they all followed his order and marched each one in his own separate course until they became united and walked all in the exact same way – creating circles around the choir room.

"Now, start walking even slower and slower, and close your eyes"

"I hope this leads somewhere" Quinn sounded doubtful of this way of teaching too.

"Shh, I need you to be concentrated. Walk and think of a place you'd all like to be in, it doesn't have to be a real place. Imagine yourselves walking there even if it doesn't exists."

_Broadway stage_

_Kissing Brittany in my room_

_I'm the quarterback__and we're winning__the__championship_

_Taking__Beth__to kindergarten_

_Visiting Blaine's room_

"In a field full of unicorns" Brittany muttered.

"Very good Brittany! Just not out loud. Keep the thoughts in your head!"

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean it to escape. Let me just get it back in" She picked her hands up in the air and 'placed it back'.

"Good! You're all thinking about something! Now, focus on all the little details of that place – how does it feel, smell, what music do you hear there? Change your walking pace as if you're already there!"

"Can we open our eyes now Mr. Schue?" Finn asked.

"Yes, but if you do – don't leave the place behind you. You are still in it. You just have to imagine it harder now."

They all obeyed. Some were still walking cautiously, some running around, but all of them concentrated on something that's not there.

"Great job everyone. Now after you are sure of all the little details – what are you wearing, who's there with you, start thinking about the music of this special place, but don't sing out loud yet" he explained.

After a minute or two he asked them to stop. Schuester gave each student a piece of paper to write down their experiences and emphasized that they don't need to put any efforts into it "Just write whatever comes in your head, let the lyrics come out and later on we'll try to work with that,". When they finished , he collected the papers and put them aside.

"Ok, we're gonna take a ten minute break. Go eat something and then come back here" Will understood that they were already tired and he needs to keep them concentrated for the next activity.

Puck and Finn were slandering aside.

"Dude, I have to head home. I've got better things to do. Tell Mr. Schue I'm not feeling well,"

"What? You're leaving? But it's only the middle of the lesson" he clung to his shirt.

"Sorry, I can't. See ya tomorrow!" Puck said and disappeared out of sight.

He went to take his back pack from his locker and headed to the main door. He pulled the door and pushed it quietly a few times, but he could not open it at all. Immediately he browsed in his bag for a lock picker and started tackling the latch. Putting it in and trying to toggle the lock he moved it inside to all directions, he then felt a point that he can unleash the latch withholding the door. At first, leaning it in slowly and then pushing fiercely.

"Shit!" he murmured as he broke the lock picker right inside the latch. He tried to use his bare fingers to pull the piece of metal out, but he failed.

He looked for other ways to escape: Through the windows it was impossible, he knew that from years of experience in ditching lessons every day.

He came back to the Glee club with disappointment, trying to sidle his way back to his seat, but he was noticed.

"Puck, you're late" Schue berated him as he made his way to his seat.

Rachel and Kurt expected for more sensory exercises that awaken imagination. They were wrong. Schue was talking and talking to no end. They already knew all the details about his glee club as a teenager and how intense their rehearsals were, they've heard that lecture about thousand times. Or that he decided to repeat it, or that he had memory problems. It was all but encouraging.

Four hours of talking with some discussions and short performances in the middle where each member presented a song wasn't good enough for Kurt. All he could think of was the dinner with Blaine. He was bored as hell, but he didn't want to disappoint Mr. Schue otherwise he would have left earlier.

At 07:00 PM exactly Mr. Schue released everyone home and they all ran fast to the main door. "I think I'm quitting glee club" Satana said "it was even worse than history lessons"

"Hey, when I have a time machine, let's go back in time together and screw our regionals performance," Brittany tried to help.

"Hey! Don't blame us for his lecturing" Kurt joined their conversation as they ran down the corridor.

Rachel, Tina and Quinn were already by the door, waiting. "There's no need to run, we have to wait for Mr. Schue to open the door"

"Why was it locked anyway?" Tina said.

"They don't want anyone to break into school" Mr Schue said and took out the key from his pocket.

Puck wanted to say something, but he couldn't think of even one good explanation.

"Weird, it won't open" Schue said while trying to slide the key in.

"Are you sure it's the right key?" Rachel asked. Will checked all the keys that were in his pocket, but none of them fit it.

"Guys, I'm going to call Mr. Figgins and see what we can do"

"This is the worst day ever," Santana sat on the floor and placed her head between her knees.

"Maybe we can use the emergency exit?" Mike suggested.

"No. no. it will trigger an alarm. It's only in case of fire or earthquake" Schue explained.

"Wouldn't hurt to cause a little fire here" Puck joked.

"Please don't get us in more trouble, Puck" he went to call Figgins and came back only half an hour later telling them that he left him three messages, but didn't get any response from the principal.

"Let's just all sleep here together" Brittany offered as she helped Santana get up from the floor.

"We can't Brittany, we have other commitments" Will was walking back and forth around the corridor, but there was no solution he could offer.

"I...I have to tell Blaine I'm not coming for dinner" Kurt sighed and went into an empty classroom

"What do you mean you're not coming?" Blaine left the Warblers at a coffee shop in Kurt's neighbourhood and was on his way to his house "So we'll do it some other day?" Blaine offered.

"No! No, Carole worked hard on his dinner. Go talk to them, even for a short while..."

"Wouldn't it be weird that you're not there?" Blaine chuckled and glanced at the little present he had made for Kurt yesterday.

"I'll call dad and tell him I'm stuck here" Kurt calmed him "it will be fine. I'm sure they're gonna like you."

"I really hope so" he smiled and hung up as he arrived at the front of the door. He waited for five minutes, to make sure Kurt called Burt and then he rang the doorbell.

"Hi, Burt, Carole. How are you?"

"Come on in Blaine, it's so nice to see you again!" Carole greeted him and signalled him to put his coat on the rack.

"I heard that both Finn and Kurt aren't coming for the dinner, Blaine, I suggest we'll have our conversation some other time." Burt said as Blaine was at the entrance.

"I understand" he nodded and went to pick up his stuff, but Carole resented the idea of cancelling the whole deal.

"Blaine, honey. It's the first time I finally get to meet you," she welcomed him with a hug. "How are you doing? How's school?" She spoke as she took out some sauces from the fridge and placed them on the table. "Burt, do you think it's a good idea to send him home when there's so much food here?" She said while putting on her kitchen gloves and taking the vegetable pie out of the oven.

"Well, what do you suggest?" he sat down in front of Blaine, rubbing his hands together and smiling uncomfortably at him.

"We'll have dinner with Kurt on another evening" She managed to put on the small table two large bowls of salad along with everything else.

They sat down together and asked Blaine all they had in mind: where's he from, what do his parents do for work, how he gets along with Kurt, his future plans… They asked him all they could and he kept implying how much he likes Kurt, and that he means the world to him.

"Carole, I brought dessert" Blaine took out from a bag a small baking pan. He let her unveiled the silver paper to see twelve cupcakes, each one contained a letter, forming together an "I love you Kurt".

They were both deeply impressed and Blaine gazed at Burt in a question of 'Did I pass the test or what?'

"Thank you Carole, your pie was amazing" Blaine said while picking up the dishes.

"You're welcome Blaine. Please leave the dishes to me. You're a guest here" she took the plates from him and opened the dishwasher "Besides, Burt is waiting for you in the living room for a little man to man talk."

He thanked her again and left the room.

"Blaine, come here" Burt was sitting in front of the television when Blaine sat next to him "I…I know I can't give this kind of stuff to Kurt. He'll freak out a little, but I'm glad I can have your understanding on this subject" He pulled a book from behind his back "I want you to hand this over to Kurt please."

Blaine read the title and description and blushed immediately. It was a guide for those who knew Burt's pamphlets by heart.

"It's for you too, If you know what I mean…" Burt turned his head a little to the side and immediately turned on the television though he had no intention to watch anything.

"Thank you, Burt. We are so lucky to have your support" Blaine said with all the manners he could muster "but I think it's too early for us to start using it."

Burt's face lightened at the fact that Blaine proved his seriousness.

"I'll talk to him about it, I promise. Oh, and Burt – I want you to know that he has changed. I mean, I believe that he'll listen to you as well."

Burt nodded and glanced at Blaine, now he was sure his son couldn't have chosen someone more fitting.

Blaine and Kurt were texting until 02:00 AM. Neither of them went to sleep as Blaine was busy performing with the Warblers in a few teen clubs and Kurt made himself a comfy bed out of the auditorium cushions. They had to text each other because the glee choir room as well as the club Blaine was in, were all too noisy.

Kurt's place was between Rachel and Tina. He lay on his back and ignored the conversation between Quinn, Santana and the other girls.

_I'm__thinking about you._ He texted Blaine and got back:

_I just got back from your house. Your dad gave me a book for you named 'the joy of gay sex' :D_

Kurt wasn't so pleased. He texted: _OMG, when will he stop being so embarrassing?_

Kurt lay back on the cushions and turned on his side, waiting for Blaine to replay.

_I actually thought it was cute. I told him though that you're not a baby penguin anymore. Anyway, I'm going to perform 'Animal' right now! Wish me luck!_

Rachel got up and all she could see in the dark was Kurt's cheerful face, writing his boyfriend back.

_You don't need any! I know you're gonna kill it! You're still here? In Lima?_Kurt wondered_._

_Yes, I'm hanging out with the guys from Dalton! BTW Your dad told me so much about you and then we looked at some albums. He showed me you loved to make tea parties in the lawn. It was so adorable! Had to mention it! Talk to you later!_Kurt giggled. He loved how Blaine always added more exclamation marks than needed.

_I love you._He wanted to feel Blaine, wanted him to be near. Wanted to smell his aftershave and wanted warm up against his skin. He's not that young boy anymore, that person is long gone.

"Kurt! Kurt, turn your cell phone off, I can't sleep with that sheer light!" Rachel pleaded.

"Rachel, until people will make the efforts needed to be a little quieter we won't be going to sleep"

Rachel sighed "I guess If we can't beat them we should join them" she sat on the cushions and tried to enter the conversation.

They listened to Quinn's gossip until 04:00 AM and then what seemed in the darkness like Santana and Brittany left the choir room for a long time. They could finally fall asleep, though Kurt kept waiting for Blaine to text him an 'I love you too' which never came.

_You're still in Lima?_ Kurt messaged him at 7:30 AM when finally the janitor came to bust open the entrance door_._

Kurt and all the others went back home to change clothes. No one but Artie and Mercedes got back to the lessons that day.

_Yes. We just woke up. It's kind of weird how we all fell asleep sitting. How was your night?_He replied after two hours.

_I'm ditching school today, let's do something insane._Kurt texted him and waited for his approval.

_I can't, I have some friends counting on me here. I'm going back to Westerville and I'll be back at Lima just in time for prom._

'He better be here' Kurt threatened him in his head and then texted him the same thought. Kurt kept imagining the night of the prom as the happiest day of his life and he wanted Blaine to arrive as early as possible so they can get ready.


	9. Now that you're mine

_**Now that you're mine…**_

It was their last two weeks of school, last lessons before the OGT exams, last visits to the school library before Kurt became a senior. He's in a phase in life he will always look back at.

Kurt had to admit that in McKinley it was much more boring than Dalton, the weeks have passed and although they were practicing really hard in the glee club they still couldn't find the right songs for Nationals.

Blaine missed Kurt badly, and every day that he finished school early he drove to Lima to be with Kurt the entire afternoon.

At that sunny day of summer they were sitting together and preparing for an exam when suddenly Rachel called.

"Kurt! Registration is open now! Let's apply" she yelled excited without even saying hello.

It took him a few seconds to realize what she's talking about and then she added herself "for Juilliard! Can I come over? We can fill the forms together!"

Rachel wasn't auditioning for one school, no. She was planning to fill forms for seven different schools and she was preparing different demands and audition materials for all of them.

"Uh yeah, sure. Blaine's here too. Could you print one form for him too?"

"Who is it?" Blaine asked, trying to understand the conversation.

"Oh sorry, I didn't think I was interrupting.." she giggled "yes, I'm bringing ones for you for Juilliard, NYU, Strasberg, Stela Adler and New York film academy, do you need anything else?"

"Rachel, I do not intend doing more than one audition. Bring us both just for Juilliard"

"I suggest you be smart and try NYU too. It's near impossible to get in to Juiliard. Besides, it will be quite sad if you won't be studying with me."

"Rachel, you have no idea where you are studying. Let's just hope we all get in to Juilliard together."

"I'll be at your house in a few minutes. Let me get this whole bundle of papers printed " she hung up.

"Was that Rach?" Blaine wondered as he lay back on Kurt's bed.

"Yes, I had to tell her to come over right now or she'd never leave me alone with all her enthusiasm about New York"

"You're applying to Juilliard today?" he wrapped his hands on Kurt's chest and pulled him back to the bed.

"Yes, I thought you were cool with the whole New York thing" Kurt turned to look at him.

"I am, but my parents aren't as much." It took Kurt time to realize how bad this news was to him. He froze for a few seconds and couldn't say a word.

"What? What did they say?"

"That as long as they're alive, there's no way I'll be studying performing arts and that it's a waste of my abilities," he sighed "you know the whole deal, acting is not a profession. Not all parents are like yours" he admitted jealously.

"Oh my god. Blaine." Kurt's face contorted in frustration and his eyes reddened a little but he didn't cry over that, he was still trying to comprehend the thought that Blaine might not be coming with him after graduation.

"Sorry I've never told you about this before. I...I thought I might be able to earn enough money to come and learn with you, but I calculated and even if I work the whole summer nonstop, I won't have enough tuition for a year"

Kurt sighed and hugged Blaine fiercely "I…I don't care what your parents say. You're coming with me. You're too talented actor to let it all waste just because it's not your parents dream"

"I didn't say I'm not coming with you. I will rent an apartment with you, Rachel and Finn just like I promised. I just…won't be studying. I will work all day to pay the rent" he patted Kurt.

"That just makes me imagine such a sad future. You deserve to try out for an acting school, much more than me."

"Don't worry. I will fill the form with you, you know, just in case I'll get a full scholarship" he kissed his cheek.

"I see you have already given this some thought." Kurt strengthened the grip of Blaine's arms on his body.

"A little. Kurt, I won't stand to be away from you when we graduate. In fact, I'm tired of these trips to Lima every day. I am thinking of moving to McKinley" he whispered the last words, because he still wasn't confident about telling this to Kurt right now.

"But... you're a real Warbler. The word dapper was named after you: Blaine Dapper Anderson. Don't expect me to just let you move to McKinley for me when all your friends are at Westerville" He did wish Blaine would be in McKinley, but it's just so selfish of him "You are not moving to McKinley Blaine! I don't want to hear another word from you!"

They lay silent on Kurt's bed for another ten minutes and then Rachel arrived with her usual enthusiasm.

She sat on Kurt's bed and took out the pile of papers from her bag. She split it to four papers to Kurt and Blaine, and the rest she kept in front of her.

"Rachel, for how many schools did you consider applying?" Blaine asked when he saw the pile of papers she brought for herself.

"Oh, I'm only auditioning to the main acting schools in new York. I have the papers here for about five schools; I've already applied to the rest." She grinned proudly.

She started scattering her papers on the bed to show them the logos of each school. Kurt and Blaine didn't realize how seriously insane she was until then.

"Kurt, I'm sending them all today. Mr Schue already gave me his recommendation letter and I've already written a different essay with reasons for studying for each application."

Blaine couldn't listen to her any second longer "I'm going to get us some drinks." he got up and left.

"Ok Kurt, where's your resume?" Rachel got the envelope ready for him.

"I…haven't written it yet?"

"You shouldn't be so cavalier, it's ten weeks before the auditions, everything should be ready by now"

"I know, I know. I'll probably do it this week" He said to calm down Rachel and her unnerving reactions.

"I mean, you have to take this more seriously, there's only-"

"Rachel calm down! I still don't understand why are you applying to so many different schools" he looked again at all the empty forms : _can someone be that obsessed? _

"That's how I'll be sure to be accepted to somewhere in New York" she slowly explained the obvious.

"Ok" Blaine got back up the stairs with glasses of water to everyone. He handed one to Kurt and one to Rachel and they all leaned back on the wall.

"Well, let's get started. As you all know, I'm applying for Juilliard too, so let's do this together" she giggled, unaware of how Blaine felt.

They all took pens in their hands and started writing.

"Legal Name…" Rachel read and they all wrote their names on the form.

"Mailing address…" Blaine wrote his home address in Westerville and thought that might be the last year he'll live in this city.

"Date of birth.." Kurt read and they all wrote theirs.

"I confirm that I can speak, write and read English with proficiency. Yup" They all checked the box.

"Oh, ok. That's interesting" Blaine noted "write all your previous performance experience"

"Well, that's my favourite part" She screamed and she and Blaine laughed and started writing.

Kurt wrote the glee club and gazed around amazed by the amount of experience they both have. They both exceeded the blank lines for description and started writing smaller and smaller handwriting to try and fit everything in.

Kurt leaned back at the wall again and waited for them to finish already.

"Ok, signature" Rachel read and the three of them signed "I'll add the golden star later" she mumbled.

"I have envelopes for you over here, but you won't be sending it today anyway, not without recommendation letters" she smiled. "but good luck to us! I mean we're going to New York!" she yelled and Kurt joined her excitement in order not to let her down.

"Could you even imagine how amazing it is going to be to the four of us?" she gasped agitatedly and then smiled.

She wrote down on a little note all the steps the boys need to do for applying and Blaine wasn't surprised anymore that she remembered all of it by heart, she was a little crazy.

"Thanks Rachel, you're awesome" Kurt kissed her on a cheek when they parted and he was again alone with Blaine in his room.

Kurt added one step to the list '_getting a scholarship for Blainers :-)_' he wrote and left a little box on the side that they will check when it's done.

"Kurt, I want this too. But don't count on it, it's extremely hard to get in to that school, so you could bet that the scholarship is ten times more difficult to achieve."

"Blaine," he caressed his soft almost curly hair as he spoke "you're the one who always told me that nothing is impossible unless we let our fear stop us, and you know that we have no fears" he placed his lips on Blaine's, in such a way that Blaine couldn't resist staying until the morning.

That night, Kurt rolled in bed left and right, thinking of all the possible jobs he can take order to help Blaine with the flight ticket and the tuition.

Kurt couldn't decide what he's feeling right now: the prom was nothing as expected. Looking back at what happened two hours ago, he cried so much that evening from humiliation that he couldn't cry anymore. But he's trying to leave that mistake behind. It's not like him to be ashamed of himself, but the thought that the whole school wanted to cause him pain…He had to push all of this aside.

He was lying on the bed next to Blaine, trying to hold the tears, but they kept coming every time he remembered principal Figgins announcement of Kurt being a queen. Bullying days weren't over, people just chose to hate him passively now and it's no better. He started sobbing into the pillow like the stock of tears inside him was renewed and Blaine hurried to lay a comforting hand on his back.

Kurt got up fast and ran to the bathroom to bring more Kleenex. Blaine sighed and decided not to follow him, but for some reason he didn't return.

Blaine had been lying on Kurt's bed for about twenty minutes, waiting for him to walk into the room any second.

"Blaine, are you sleeping?" apparently he was until Kurt came back.

"What time is it?" he murmured.

"It's two AM, everyone's asleep so be quiet" he said with a familiar smirk on his lips. Blaine was astounded but cooperated when Kurt put a blindfold on his eyes and led him carefully into the bathroom. "Kurt, you're taking advantage of the fact that I'm tired to object." He joked because he had a feeling what Kurt was plotting.

Blaine chuckled when he opened his eyes: he expected some lights but it was all dark there. His eyes focused on the candles that filled the dark room, there were about fifty of them.

"What's that?" Blaine asked.

"Care to fool around with me?" Kurt beckoned.

"Kurt, are you serious? Your parents are in the next room!" he whispered back.

"They gave you a sex guide! I'm sure they'll approve and except that-" he turned on the water in the shower "No one can hear us now, no matter what we do" he kissed Blaine and undressed him slowly.

"Well that's what I want too, but...don't you want to wait until we get to New York?" he caressed Kurt's cheek tenderly "let's make it real special."

"I don't know..." Kurt took off Blaine's pants and pleaded to give him a blowjob, but Blaine kept his distance from him once Kurt managed to take off his boxers.

Kurt was a bit surprised of his strong reaction and waited for Blaine to say something.

"We can still have an awesome night together," Blaine tried to explain, but he couldn't talk while Kurt was pursing his lips against his. Blaine unzipped Kurt's trousers and helped him out of his clothes too and then tucked Kurt closed to him. Their bodies were now fully touching each other for the first time. Blaine gently rubbed his cheek over Kurt's "Let's take things slow. I want you to enjoy the intimacy today, but let's not make a rush move."

"You're right, I do have to get used to seeing you like this" Kurt confided. They both took their underwear off and entered the shower together.

They were both concentrated on examining the other's body: the structure, amount of hair and Blaine focused on staring at Kurt's cute butt. He couldn't take the cuteness out of him if he tried, and that delicateness is what he loved most about him.

Inside the shower, on a very high shelf, were three lit candles that helped them see each other within the shadows.

Kurt took the shampoo and started lathering Blaine's soft hair "you wouldn't mind having the smell of my shampoo?" he whispered though no one could hear them under the water's rush.

"You know I don't mind" Blaine answered.

"I love your natural smell," Kurt said after a minute "I find your sweat so alluring." Kurt pressed his nose to Blaine's back and tried to breathe him, the familiar scent made him shiver.

"Well, I couldn't want anything more in the world other than alluring you" he hummed with serenity, tilting his head in pleasure, as Kurt's fingers ran through his hair.

Kurt placed his hand on the tap "do you want hotter or colder?"

Blaine laughed "Look at me, probably a cold shower" Kurt nodded in agreement and Blaine gasped as the water ran down his spine, leaving trails of shampoo on his back.

Blaine looked at Kurt's eyes through the curtain of water: they were gleaming with joy. _So that's what a man in love looks like_. Kurt took the bottle of liquid soap in one hand, and the simple soap bar in the other as if asking Blaine to choose.

Blaine motioned in his head toward the soap bar, and Kurt started running it on his shoulders and back, his heart beating heavily again. _Same as ever, _ Blaine thought.

Kurt moved back to face Blaine again, he noticed that Blaine got used to the cold water, because his breath became warm again against Kurt's face.

"You know, we can turn it into a really great thing if we wait."

"The more we wait, the more exciting it will be." Kurt pretended he agreed.

"It will be like… epic, one of the things you wait for so much, that when it happens…it'll be perfect."

_Yeah, for you you've done it so many times before_. Kurt thought.

Blaine shivered. _Could this be it? No more searching for someone to complete me? I found someone who'll be beside me forever?_

Kurt moved the glass door of the shower and stood on a wool carpet, still encircled by a few candles that haven't gone out. He pulled two towels that waited for them near the sink and covered Blaine in one.

"Let's go to sleep" he shook his hair in a sharp movement and a trail of water went out from his hair "do you want a toothpick?" he asked while taking one for himself.

They've brushed their teeth together and prepared for their first meaningful night in the same bed.

"Oh, I have plenty of interesting ideas for us." Kurt said as he dried his hair.

"With our clothes on?" Blaine assured.

"Yup, with our clothes on." He opened his dresser. "I can give you a massage or… give you a facial treatment…"

"It's four am so… I'm keeping your promise for that massage for tomorrow?" he replied and approached Kurt "Let's see what clothes I can sleep in" He searched it the closet.

"Blaine! Stay away from my designer's clothes." Kurt protested and pulled his hands out.

"Fine. Bring me anything you want" he said while the towel is still wrapped on his pelvis.

"Well, can I bring you something pink?" he smiled and pulled out a plain t-shirt "Please I really want to see you wearing that!"

"Fine" he giggled quietly, trying not to talk to loud "just give me one of your boxers and let's just go to bed." Kurt threw a pair of white underpants at him and Blaine quickly got dressed

.

"Can you turn out the lights?" Kurt said and ran to the bed. Blaine entered under the blankets right after him after turning off all the lights "We've been like this before once. Remember?"

"Yeah, that night when you were totally wasted." He giggled, letting the thoughts about the prom drift away.

"What did you think of me then?"

"Nothing could have happened between us then. I couldn't make a move on someone who's drunk, but you also had the hots for Rachel then." They both laughed at that old memory.

"Thought I was bi. Wow that was just so funny!"

"Not as funny as my father's reaction when he saw you in my bed,"

"Well, that was also one of a kind, though I had a hangover and I didn't really catch that…"

"Maybe you'll get a second chance tomorrow, just stay in my bed until he comes." It was dark, but Blaine could feel how he's smiling at him.

"Maybe," he wrapped his hand on Kurt's body, leaning his palm on his belly, "but this time let's try spooning…" he turned Kurt around so he could wrap his hands around him.

_He thinks I'm still afraid from that?_ Kurt lingered into thoughts: _Oh Blaine, why can't you see I've changed? Yes, I'm a bit scared of that, but just like you've said: that doesn't mean I shouldn't do it. Oh my god Blaine. I've turned you into a romanticist like me! I think I even like that_! 

Blaine's thoughts were mostly '_I love sleeping spooning but is it really comfortable to you to place your hand on my groin?_' 

"I can't sleep like that." he whispered and moved Kurt's hand and placed it up on the pillow. "And I'm sure it was pretty uncomfortable for you too."

Kurt was already asleep.

In about two weeks from the evening that he told Blaine that he's moving back, Kurt got used to the familiar corridors of McKinley and the schedule rehearsals of New Directions again and was more than impressed to see that Karofsky was keeping himself out of sight. He might have come across him once or twice in the hallway or cafeteria, but Dave did his best to act like Kurt didn't even exist. He had enough trouble as it is with his parents, he didn't want any more of them in school.

But today, Kurt had to break off the pattern of that pretence, because he knew Dave was suffering and there was no one there for him. He got early to school this morning, early enough to rip off the sign at the slushie hallway that read: "Welcome Dave Karofsky – King of fags". He tore it to pieces and crushed it into the trash bin.

That day in school, Karofsky did his best to act like usual in class: sitting in the back line, never speaking, never raising his head from his notebook. He did feel how the people who used to be his friends are now piercing their eyes at him, staring him in a way that stabbed his heart.

It all exploded after the practice of the football team. No one agreed to hand him the ball and it felt like they are throwing it at him. He kept brushing off the feeling that they know about him. He decided not to take a shower after the practice was over, he wanted to hurry home straight away, to a place where he can cry and nobody could tease him about it.

He opened his locker to get back his clothes, but they weren't there.

"Hey, homo! Lost your pants?" Azimio said from across the room. Karofsky was stunned. He looked around him, trying to find a friend to cling to.

"That's ok, I'm sure he doesn't need any," attacked him Scott from the other side of the dressing room.

"What the hell are you talking about? I'm straight!" He yelled with all the self-confidence he could muster "I am dating Santana Lopez!" he sighed and picked up his back pack, trying to leave.

"Everyone knows she dated you just to get the prom queen title," Ernie mocked him "That's why you picked on Hummel so hard, you tried to woe him" he spoke in a high pitched voice.

"You're fucking stupid" Dave was thinking about his option to become violent again. If he hit Ernie hard enough, no one would dare mess with him anymore, but the only thing he felt at that moment was how the blood is cooling down in his veins, and how scared he is to attack someone when the rest of the guys are not on his side.

"Go to hell" he yelled at his face and ran out of the room.

"Wash your corn hole before you ever talk to me again" Azimio shouted through the door and the others roared in laughter.

He didn't want to take the bus home dressed like that, the football uniforms were filled with dirt and mud. He decides to hide for now until they all leave the locker room and then he'll go looking for clothes again.

But it's unbelievable how everything turned like that in just one day. They were all his friends. Each and every one of them adored his strength and his football skills. Now they don't even care. He can just go to the dumps, just like all the geeks they're throwing there for their morning welcoming ritual.

He locked himself in the toilet, imagining how he's revenging all these jerks and showing them that no one should deal with him. Then he gets back to the sad reality and thinks what's the best way to disappear into the ground for at least two weeks, to have them forget about it. Or at least make it old news.

It was four PM, they must have been all gone home already. If he'll just sneak into the locker room he could find a spare shirt and trousers…

"Ow, careful!" someone scolded him. He had bumped the door on Kurt that was just using the cooler.

"Oh, umm. Hi" Karofsky said hurriedly "sorry, and goodbye"

"Bye" a dazed Kurt answered back "why are you even here so late?" Kurt wondered.

"Practiced was delayed a little" he lied.

"Finn and Puck returned from practice a long time ago," he contradicted his words.

"I-I have to go" Dave ran down the corridor. He didn't want to be mocked by Kurt too.

"Wait, listen!" Kurt called him "Finn told me what…they…did to you" he said in a low voice "so…just wanted to tell you that you're not alone."

Karofsky turned and dismissed him "I don't need your pity. Leave me alone!"

In that second, Kurt couldn't believe how much sorrow can be contained in just two red, weary eyes.

Kurt ran and stood in front of the strong man who used to bully him "I don't know why you're running away, but just so you know- I took off all these signs" he pointed at the big white one above them and ripped him too "this one's probably new," he crumbled it into a ball and stuffed it into the full trash bin.

"It doesn't matter. The whole school already knows, I wish I could just die" he clasped his face with his hands "Ugh! Azimio did this! I know it's him" he yelled uncontrollably.

"But how the hell do they know, Kurt?" he whined "Who the fuck told them?"

"You know what the good is in all this?" Kurt said softly "Now you don't have to live in fear that someone will find out who you really are. Don't be afraid to be yourself anymore, David, believe me you're stronger than you think" Kurt promised him.

Dave ran away, trying to find the locker room and get some clean clothes. He was finally alone there, but the realization dawned upon him that he didn't even care. Nothing matters anymore. He got dressed back and went to catch the bus home, thinking that he doesn't care if he freezes to death in that wind, or if the bus ever comes or not. Why should he even want things to happen, when all that life is doing is to go against him and carve in his mind one humiliation after another?

He wanted only one thing – to sleep and wake up in a world where there's no such thing as straight or gay.

Kurt saw that Dave was missing from school for a whole week. He started worrying and called him. Karofsky could barely answer the phone. He lied to his parents that he's sick and started feeling ill himself too. He didn't have any reason to answer the phone; just like he'd ignored the prank calls so far, he'll ignore this.

Kurt called to his home number.

"I'm just sick, Kurt" he wanted him to back off.

"Dave, telling someone about your depression might help you get out of this,"

"I don't want to tell you anything. Stop calling me!"

"Fine, I'll leave you be, but if you change your mind – I'll be in the Ohio mall at the main entrance near the escalators at six o'clock. I'm expecting you there, Dave. You need someone right now"

He was pretty sure he's not going. He didn't take a shower for at least four days and it would take him forever to find anything normal to wear in the pile of unwashed clothes. He lay in bed for another half an hour before he realized that he was only thinking about going and what was going to happen once he got there the entire time. Some scenarios even involved Kurt kissing him goodbye as they part, some of them imagined him meeting the bullies. He keeps thinking about it in the shower…

They were in Ohio's mall. Holding hands and walking through the aisle and gazing at the shiny display windows. Every few steps Kurt stopped to check out fashionable clothes or shoes. He led his friend into a candy shop. Once inside Dave gave in a small first grin.

"I never enter these kinds of places, but today we'll make an exception"

"Oh, ok" Karofsky immediately agreed.

Kurt lifted a small transparent bag from a nearby little box and handed it to Dave.

"I'll let you chose?" he motioned on the assorted sweets.

"Um, I don't know what you like" he said helplessly and observed all the colorful walls that displayed all the types of candy he could possibly imagine: hard gums, jelly in all forms and colors, fruit dots, jelly beans, bumper bananas, marshmallows, strawberry bonbons, m&m's….

"There's actually nothing here that I usually eat. I evade that stuff at any cost, but today we're making an exception. You need some sugar right now."

"We don't have to be here if you don't eat any of these..."

"It doesn't matter right now" he said dominantly "We are cheering you up at any cost" with his finger he circled the wall, pointing for Karofsky to just take something.

Dave opened one of the plastic boxes, picked up the little metal shovel and put some fizzy jelly snakes and strawberry like candies.

"Ok" he turned back to Kurt with sealed lips; concealing his feelings right now.

"The reason I asked you to choose…" Kurt explained "is because I wanted you to see that these different candies and sweets are just like your life: there are tons of possibilities for you to choose from. Some are sweet, some are more sour, but life can be seen through so many colors – just like these jelly snakes."

They paid and left the store.

"Let's break the habit" Kurt took one jelly strawberry from the bag "I noticed I'm most happy whenever I do something unusual, or new. You shouldn't stay in Mckinley anymore and just suffer. Find another place, new friends. Just like I did."

"But you came back from Dalton"

"That right, my main oppressor is now on my side. And anyway, I'm much stronger now and Blaine's there for me-"

Dave sighed, lingered in deep thoughts and was close to making a decision

.

"I have to see if it's an option to me, to move to another school" he murmured "My parents will ask why and I can't tell them the real reason. They'll never accept me the way I am."

Kurt nodded in understanding "Dave, there will always be people who won't accept you the way you are, even if you were straight. There are always those we can never get to like us, but that's their problem and they'll have to get over it" He spoke as they sat in the middle of the mall on a bench in front of a large fountain.

Karofsky nodded in agreement.

"And remember that Blaine and I are always there for you. Let's leave our past behind us. I'll tell you what Blaine used to say to me when I was in your situation – there's a lot more courage in you than you think!"

"I'll try to remember that" he replied while looking at the little children playing tag around the benches in front of them, trying to imagine who will they be when they turn 18.

"Dave" Kurt held his hand and Karofsky swallowed in discomfort "Please keep in touch with us. If there will ever be a moment when you feel alone in this pick up the phone and call me or Blaine."

"Ok, I promise,"

"Now bring me your cellphone, I'll show you how to block these jerks from your Facebook."

Dave passed his phone to Kurt whilst they continued to sit. Kurt was still doing anything he could in order to bring the smile of confidence back to his lips.

It was a week before nationals when Kurt decided to tell Blaine the truth. After the Glee club rehearsals Kurt drove all the way to Westerville and knocked on his door.

Blaine was expecting to host him for the weekend, and when he opened the door he was surprised to see how early he arrived.

"Just in time for our classic movies marathon," he lifted the bag full of DVD's to show him "I…I love your house." Kurt said as he entered to the living room.

"Come up to my room." He took Kurt's luggage up the stairs and Kurt followed him.

"I think I'll go make dinner in the meantime?" Kurt muttered, but as he entered the room he saw there's no need.

Blaine had it all set for them. He even moved the blankets for Kurt and covered him up.

"Blaine, before we watch that movie, I have something to say…" he tried to sound mysterious. Blaine was attentive.

"I…come closer." He ordered Blaine.

"I've saved enough for you," he whispered in his ear "I've worked in two part time jobs apart from dad's garage and… You have enough for everything, enough for the tuition and enough for our planned stay at the hotel. We have one more year of high school to earn our rent and that's it…you won't be needing the scholarship. You're coming with me."

"No, I can't just-" Kurt silenced him with a long kiss. He pushed the food trays aside and tried to convince Blaine to agree, or else he won't let go of his lips.


	10. Finally alone

**Chaper 10 - Finally Alone**

Rating: PG-13  
Length: 3,663 words.  
Ship: Klaine.

It was the most stressful day Kurt ever had in his life. He hadn't slept one second that night and in order not to interrupt Blaine's sleep he got up twice and went in to the bathroom to wash his face and cry a little. He sensed that he couldn't stand the pressure anymore and apparently even Blaine wouldn't be able to understand what he's going through.

He pulled out the paper with his monologue and repeated the lines

_"O, what a rogue and peasant slave am I! Is it not monstrous that this player here, But in a fiction, in a dream of passion, Could force his soul so to his own conceit"_

He remembers it. He must remember it. Each time he rereads the words his thoughts wander into the cold room where he will be standing at tomorrow morning. Standing alone as eight pairs of eyes examine him. He was trying to understand how he could not be frozen knowing that every single movement he does is being put to the test and affects his acceptance to theatre studies.

He can't wake Blaine now. It wouldn't be fair that Blaine will be exhausted in his audition just because of him. He must be quiet.

Kurt washed his face for the third time in cold water. He dried himself with the little towel and sneaked back into the double bed that felt more uninviting than ever. He tried placing his head in every possible angle, but the pillow felt estranged.

Every single position on the bed felt uncomfortable. He clung to Blaine, trying to breathe in hope from his low breaths. He slowly pressed his hand on Blaine's back, trying to focus all his thoughts in one single spot, in Blaine's heartbeats and not the horrible test that would occur tomorrow. He knew that something else is probably going to happen tomorrow, but he was too concentrated on thoughts about Juilliard that he could still deny all of the other worries.

"Kurt! Kurt!" Kurt rose from the bed frightened and lifted aside the blankets "your alarm clock is ringing, haven't you noticed?"

"It's today…it's…today" he gasped and jumped out of bed.

The clothes that Kurt chose for the audition were already placed on the little couch in front of him. He wore them even before his thoughts woke up and started stressing him more. His heart was beating fast. How can Blaine be so calm?

"Blaine" he turned to him "when did you get dressed?"

"What? Ah, just now" he said while searching for documents in his backpack "I'm making tea, you want some?"

"Yes…yes" Kurt yawned and went to brush his teeth when the thoughts started popping again: must run and catch the subway early, must not forget any of the documents at home, I can't forget lines from the monologue, maybe I should rehearse it on my way, oh and get something to eat right before the test, and bring a bottle of water, there might be a long line there. Kurt was in a situation where he was willing to do anything including jumping from the balcony and breaking a leg, just so that he wouldn't have to confront that moment when a group of experts evaluated his abilities.

"Finished brushing your teeth?" Blaine approached him with his backpack, already prepared for the audition "come here" he kissed him on the lips and Kurt didn't want to let go.

"Mmm mint," Blaine joked "let's warm your tongue a little bit" he gave him his mug of tea and sat in front of him to drink from his cup. Kurt was quieter than usual.

"Kurt I know you're tense. I am too."

_Not like I am hun, you slept for ten hours_

"I can't believe that I can barely talk to you. I will declare my audition a success if I manage to talk to them" Kurt meant the evaluators - they were dark vague figure and just the thought of them made his heart race.

"Come on. Stop it! You'll be great," he patted his shoulder "we'll get through this together, and we'll even make it fun." He put down his tea to get up and hug him.

"Thanks, Blaine." Kurt sank in his seat in frustration while Blaine hurried to arrange Kurt's stuff in the backpack they were sharing.

After Kurt continued to linger a few more minutes in dazed state, like he'd just returned from a war - an inner war with himself. Blaine gently pulled him outside of the room, slowly locking the door.

Kurt started running down the corridor when Blaine stopped him "Kurt, there's still plenty of time! Let's just try and calmly make our way there," he chuckled and led Kurt to the elevator.

"Thanks," Kurt said and rubbed his head on Blaine's shoulder "I admit I haven't slept enough." He yawned again.

They got together to the entrance floor of the hotel. All the people seemed to be concentrated in their routine. Working in serenity like it's just another day of living; moving without any expectations. They weren't like Kurt – splitting his life to before and after.

Neither the clerks, nor the receptionist could see that for the tall boy that went past them, this day is one of the most important in his life.

"Wait here for a sec?" Blaine let Kurt hold their shared bag while pulling a wallet out of it then he entered the little coffee place that was near the entrance door. Kurt didn't have to wait for him long. He returned with two muffins and a lettuce sandwich for Kurt.

"Everything is going to be fine" he whispered in his ear while they went past the turning door in the exit of the hotel. It was a sunny day in the city of sky scrapers that they wanted to live in so much.

"Blaine, how can you be so calm?" Kurt asked while they walked side by side into the subway on their way to Columbus.

"I'm really stressed too Kurt, in case you haven't seen." He longed for a little bit of attention from him

"You're hiding it really well," Kurt emphasized as they passed the ticket machine and stood together in the crowded car where people were squashing them in all directions.

"I've done a lot of auditions" Blaine tried to explain his ability to withstand the pressure "at some point the body doesn't have any more energy to excite itself all over again. It just…gets used to it."

"You just have to get through this." Kurt understood as they reached the underground station and made their way between the hundreds of people into the stairway up into the warm street.

Kurt, I helped you prepare for that monologue. Trust me when I tell you that you'll be amazing"

"Thanks" He rubbed his nose on Blaine's and kissed him, "I'm just afraid that it will all go to waste once I stand there in front of them and start to tremble and stutter and-"

Hey, trust me – you won't. Just a little bit of courage and you'll get through this too"

They crossed the road together and continued to walk slowly a few more streets until they got there - Juilliard. The place they will study together, if they could only be talented enough and if Rachel wasn't accepted to NYU.

Kurt didn't know if it's stressing or soothing to see how huge the place is. He closed his eyes and Blaine's hand pulls him inside the huge glass doors and up the stairs into the second floor.

Ten other candidates were there: leaning on the walls, sitting on the chairs or walking in circles while revising their monologues, trying to cling to the words that will stay in them as they go through the door.

Blaine turned to all of them "Hi everyone, is this where the auditions for Juilliard acting program are?"

"Yes" a blond boy answered "Did you register in advance?"

"Oh, yes. I am Blaine" he shook his hand "maybe we'll classmates here next year"

"I hope so. This is the last day of exams and the testers are pretty tired" he didn't mean to scare them, more to pray that it will turn out for the best for everyone.

Kurt took the papers of his two monologues and started mumbling them while stalking around, waiting for Gregory Jones and Grace Perce to enter before him and then he'll have seven torturous minutes of thinking that he's next. Blaine sat on the floor with his back leaning on the wall. He didn't memorize his text and didn't even let himself think about it. He just closed his eyes and breathed a set of steady slow breathes, like he's shedding the pressure off of him each time.

Kurt decided to shut down the voice inside him that kept saying 'only 18 out of thousands are finally accepted' He turned to speak too to all the candidates that were there, quietly, so he won't interrupt the boy who's inside, but seriously.

"Listen guys. Our odds of acceptances are slim. Only a tenth of applicants are accepted each year to study acting here but it doesn't even matter now! I mean, it's fun to pass the test, but we have to believe that it's not what's going to stop you and me from developing an acting career." One of the boys nodded emphatically.

"I mean, if we don't, it means we deserve a much better place. We can't give the 4 people beyond this door more power on us than what they truly deserve. Let's stop. I will do my best to impress them. If they can't recognize the potential that I see in myself and that I believe that exists in all of you, and in every single person in this world, then I guess it's not the best acting school in New York. It will only mean that we deserve better!"

A few smiles that appeared on the worried faces proved Kurt that he was agreed with. Blaine also looked at him with proud, gleaming eyes.

"Hey! Let's create a circle" Blaine convinced everyone with his assertiveness. Most of them cooperated.

"Everyone will tell something about himself so we can get to know each other better. I mean, we're all going to learn here together next year." He laughed and the others grinned because of his exaggerated optimism.

"You know what I like the most about acting school?" Blaine did some stand-up comedy "that you don't learn how to act there. You have to come with the experience and knowledge from beforehand. And here... You only advance from there. Silly, huh?"

The atmosphere in the corridor softened. They did a circle game where each one told one or two facts about themselves.

The first candidate came back with his head bent down.

"How was it?" someone from the circle asked him.

"A disaster. They didn't even let me finish my text." He collected his papers and ran down the stairs before he'd be asked more.

One of the girls got up and entered gently through the door.

"You know what? I'd be happy if I'm not accepted" the boy from before yelled from the stairs, voice broken, "I hate this competitive atmosphere, everyone against each other instead of fellowship and sharing between actors and between the teachers. I know there are already a limited number of places for students, but it's still done unfairly"

"I have to admit that I don't believe in talent" Blaine agreed with him trying to cheer him up.

"I understand you too" Kurt added "I cross my fingers that you get accepted anyway because each and every one of us who got to here wants it real bad."

They continued to talk more, but now as a united group; all of them sharing something big in common – the desire to get the legendary acceptance letter.

Grace Perce returned white from the test room and when Kurt Hummel passed by her to enter to his exam it was like he was infected by the white of anxiety too. Kurt was convinced that if someone were to touch his forehead they would find it cold.

He entered the room slowly and quietly, giving himself time to gaze at the evaluators that sat behind the long table and stared at him.

"Kurt Hummel" read one of them from a piece of paper.

"Yes" he said and nodded with fake confidence.

They looked at him with their pens poised in their hands, waiting for him to start his classical monologue.

He swallowed and tried to find the exact right second to start in.

He spoke loudly and with diction_ " O, what a rogue and peasant slave am I! " _he stopped after every word in order to breathe.

_"Is it not monstrous that this player here, But in a fiction, in a dream of passion,_" he mustn't hurry now. Every word must have a meaning.

_"Could force his soul so to his own conceit. That from her working all his visage wanned, "_ he gave a pause, took a deep breath and tried not to let his presence escape from the room. It would be worse if he performed the character on "automated mode" he has no chance to succeed if he falls in that trap.

_" Tears in his eyes, distraction in his aspect, A broken voice, and his whole function suiting " _line after line. On the one hand he wants it to be over already. On the other hand he's wringing all of his inner feelings like a rag and drains them into the words that Shakespeare wrote to so many actors before him.

" _I have heard that guilty creatures sitting at a play. Have by the very cunning of the scene"_ does Kurt have a little bit of Hamlet in him?

_"Been struck so to the soul that presently. They have proclaimed their malefactions,_"

There is some sorrow in him, perplexity, and indecision. Yes, he'll exploit them all from inside of him and let his emotions to colour the words.

_"For murder, though it have no tongue, will speak_

_With most miraculous organ. I'll have these players_

_Play something like the murder of my father. Before mine uncle."_

He let his unwavering concentration break for a split second to look at the testers, at their eyes that gazed through their glasses lenses or the papers they were skimming through. He's trying to conceal his lack of concentration as a long meaningful pause, but they all noticed it.

"_I'll observe his looks. I'll tent him to the quick. If 'a do blench, I know my course._" he has no choice but to let go and slow down the pace.

And to continue from a phase where one word leads to another

_"Out of my weakness and my melancholy, As he is very potent with such spirits," _histhread of thoughts is as thin as that of a spider's web. He's planning his next lines and concentrated on his inner motive at the same time.

_"Abuses me to damn me. I'll have grounds More relative than this" _he slows even more to the finishing words "_The play's the thing. Wherein I'll catch the conscience of the king._ " and finally raises his head proudly, looking at them straight while repeating to himself 'every audition pushes me forward'

"Thank you Kurt" said one of the evaluators and motioned him to call the next one.

He wants to be stressed again, but there's no energy left in him. The monologue drew all his powers away from him.

Blaine only had a short while to hug him and whisper, "you were great. I eavesdropped through the wall."

Now Blaine's in the threatening room.

"Blaine Anderson," read loudly one of the evaluators.

"Hello" Blaine replied "I will start with a classical monologue from Oedipus the kind" he started a rapport with all of them by creating eye contact and checking that they were attentive before beginning.

_"Your prayers are heard: and if you will obey. Your king, and hearken to his words, you soon shall find relief. myself will heal your woes."_

He went into a trance where there were no evaluators, no noisy air conditioner that's set on freezing cold and of course no Blaine Anderson. Just a modest Oedipus, a little young for his age, but full of life and hidden layers.

_"_ _That sceptre now is mine which Laius bore; His wife is mine; so would his children be Did any live; and therefore I am bound, E'en as he were my father, to revenge him. _" looking back, Blaine was surprised from himself too that he managed to act a king, bring a stronger persona than his own.

"_ But on you, my Thebans, Who wish us fair success, may justice smile Propitious, and the gods forever bless!"_ he finished the monologue and stopped for a second.

"I chose for my contemporary monologue The Invisible Man by Wells" he presented the second monologue before they could tell him to leave. It will be a short version of the famous Griffin monologue"

He did feel a little bit impudent for not letting them speak, but he had a feeling that this is the kind of artists they're looking for.

_"I shall tell you the whole story. But you must promise not to tell a soul. You will make a bargain with me, Dr. Kemp. Do not forget for an instant that though you cannot see me, I can see you all the time. "_He was finally doing for the last time the lines he memorized thousands of times with Kurt and he recalled all they've been through on their way to this day.

"_Do not forget for an instant that though you cannot see me, I can see you all the time. One false move-one sign of giving warning to anyone-and you are as good as dead. _" he and Kurt rehearsing together on the bus.

_"I have had many adventures as an invisible man ... but it is not going as I had planned. I am invisible only when I am undressed; with clothes on, I can be seen as easily as you. Do you know what it is like to run through the streets and fields on a night like this, without a stitch on one's back? _He and Kurt lying down on the grass near a small lake, analyzing and splitting the sentences into bits and actions.

_"Just think, man. I need an accomplice. With you in on my secret, I can take refuge in your house. I can sleep in your bed, eat at your table, warm myself by your fire, and none will be the wiser. I made a huge mistake, Kemp, in trying to carry the thing through alone_." Blaine started surprising himself again, after such a long time. He loved what he did in that audition. He was tranquil, delivering the text gently and softly. He was much more than secure and accurate, matching his words to fit for every evaluator. Looking at their eyes as he uses them for the doctor from the play. He addresses them"

He hoped that they were undergoing an inner process just like he was.

"Thank you Blaine Anderson" interrupted him in the middle of a sentence one of the testers. They must already have consolidated an opinion about him.

But..Why can't they tell him right now? How could someone just be left in the status of not knowing like that? That's what Blaine thought about as he walked through the door and cleared the room for the next candidate.

He smiled to Kurt right away in order to calm him down and turned to speak to the others "Good luck to all of you! Add me on Facebook – Blaine Anderson!" he said exuberantly and hugged one of the boys there that Kurt didn't catch the name of.

"Good luck" Kurt said right after him to everyone still there.

Finally Blaine turned his whole attention to Kurt" Come on. Let's indulge in a Cappuccino, on me" he wrapped a hand on Kurt's back and went with him to the cafeteria of Juilliard.

They sat down to drink and swap experiences from the test when Blaine noticed that Kurt was drained out from energy to continue with this day. He walked with him back to the hotel so he could catch on some sleep.

"At first I thought that I would only be able to sleep after the test, but I now I think I won't. I have to know if we got in or not."

"You're in a less stressful phase now. You did all you could and there's no thought in the world that would change that now. So let it go."

"I can't wait to get to bed already. I want to sleep like forever."

"You will, but there's something else we should be doing, sleeping beauty" he kissed Kurt in an unexpected manner, but he came back to his senses and co-operated.

The ride back on the subway was much calmer. It was also noon and the hotel was almost empty from tenants. In his room, Kurt hurled himself on the bed right away and without a word to Blaine sailed to a deep trouble free sleep.

Blaine crashed on the couch, placing his hands behind his back and trying to estimate how his auditionwas: there were parts he was satisfied with and parts that raised doubts about his ability. He told himself that ' you have to try something in order to know if it works' whenever he recalled parts he wasn't accurate in his acting.

Juilliard or not. There are hundreds of acting schools in New York and only one of them will be lucky enough to take in both Kurt Hummel and Blaine Anderson.


End file.
